Why? As opposed to what you said, I think if I pass signals to others about my insecurties or depressions from it they can sympathize what I am experiencing and then probably not gonna poke fun at my height.
Because all experience and accumulated knowledge in my opinion is that people won't be better for you and much less approach you as a potential boyfriend with that psychological appearance. Because some will sympathyse but as friends....and even among these, most will do it because they will feel pitty for you. You enter a useless spiral of downgrading your selfesteem and more depression. Maybe you find a shoulder to cry, but that's not the future you want for you, is it (caressed by some but as a teddy bear)? The way out of depression is by using positive tools, not the same negative survival mode in a swamp.
This is a harsh world. You just can't show a tear in your eyes at work for example: all in one you will be in a worse situation and more disrespected by rumours and by the silent action of the sharks that compete all day long to just smash "rivals". It's a pitty but you have to go to the toilet, close yourself and if needed cover your crying with the sound of the flashwater. Of course you need support but you just have to be very SELECTIVE. You may be right that more educated people won't poke fun at your height but those are probably those that have never poked before. And almost everybody, even nice people, sooner or later, avoid negative, problematic, sad people.
It's a pitty but on this very concrete aspect of the problem you will have to be an actor, even an hypocrite maybe sometimes. But guess what? This double pays: you'll be more respected, or at least less disrespected (ideal would be to pass the idea that you don't give a *hit about your height because you have other assets) and it also pays because it's scientifically proven that when we change our body and mind "display" we also change a bit instantly feelings inside. For example if you raise your head and smile you'll feel instantly a bit more confident. And don't forget for one reason or another that girl got interested in you. Don't thing just right away she's just (another) neurotic (she surely is not psychopatic). Start by respecting herself! Sometimes depression atracts depression but if both people get in positive mode they can use it as a tool to better understand and support each other and make nice things together, instesd of feeding each other's disease. Maybe they need counselling at the beginning but you should be ready to identify realistic opportunities and not search only for super perfect super models: they are hard to get, and you find out they may also be full of *hit.
So in synthesis, believe me, I know very well what I'm saying on this, DON'T search sympathy or pitty generally and never on those that poke fun on you. Those are and will always be toxic for you. You have either to avoid them without showing any fear or prepare a list of "missiles" to throw back at them...but always either smiling or kind of not very irritated say something like *uck off and follow your way, tell them to go back doing something useful (either working or out for example once I asked them if they prefered to look at me than go around see the beautiful girls nearby...."are you gays or what?" (with all due respect for gays, but this is a specific context and we're in "war mode" sometimes).
Seek support in other people. Of course you have to build trust on those but try that same (it's only one week, and there are more people there than her!) or other anonymous groups, old school buddies, a priest if you are religious, an activity that boosts your confidence among positive people, etc.
Train yourself to be tougher and repeat in your mind when in an "urgent episod": this: " I won't let this *ucking people ruin my mind or my day"!
Anyway these are only survival and social tactics. If you are depressed, you need to also assume that, as a first step to get out of it. Only if you find out you're depressed mainly because of your height (and conclude that medication and psychotherapy don't real help) and not that your height may only be contributing to the depression (ie, feeding and hidding other causes), you should think of CLL.
Be pacient, you are very young, and despite that apparent heightism histeria in China, until very recently the average male height (rural and urban, mixed ages) was 167 cm, so your height is not a "tragedy". There is a recent survey that says that urban boys 19 yo are average 175/176 cm tall (same as US, UK, France, Italy, Germany....) but that was a short sample and altough average height is increasing quickly in China due to better feeding and healthcare, I would say this survey may have a touch of propaganda and be biased in some way because average height just don't increase this quickly.
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Topic: How to cope with girls' consistently questioning my height? (Read 994 times)