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Author Topic: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?  (Read 1587 times)

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SpeedDialer

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What would you say to her if your goal was to stay with her?
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Exxon

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"My old height is only 2 inches less, chill"
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pandemic_exploiter

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Haha she's scared because you're tapping into a larger market. Get her to do LL with you (couple goals   8)). Jokes aside lmao. Imagine she got a face or boob job (the equivalent here imo). Would you feel some type of way / what would you want her to say after getting it? You probably know your relationship better than anyone here
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LLprime3

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I would question if she is the right one. A person who loves you would either be worried for your health/outcome or happy for you.

What you describe fits none of that, my 2 cents.
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HateLAPELoveSTEM

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Since you have got a gf, I wonder why you are still considering LL. If you are doubting her true love just bc you are short then that's surely the reason why she pissed off.
Was there any signal of her willing to cheat on u? Was the relationship not good? Is she too perfect?
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zaozari

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Tell her all the truth, including heigt neurosis,that you are not perfect , still without 100% self esteem  and say her you love her (if it's true).
Finish all your headaches wth the "sincerity" love proof and check also their reaction. If she loves you she may still doesn't agree but will understand and, who knows, even
support you.
Choose what makes you suffer the least and go ahead, don't look back!
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HumanCyborg

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Tell her all the truth, including heigt neurosis,that you are not perfect , still without 100% self esteem  and say her you love her (if it's true).
Finish all your headaches wth the "sincerity" love proof and check also their reaction. If she loves you she may still doesn't agree but will understand and, who knows, even
support you.
Choose what makes you suffer the least and go ahead, don't look back!
Never do this.
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Megatron

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Tell her why you have to do this and if she cant support you she's not the one for you. I had the same issue. She kept saying i wont look normal, she likes my natural size, doesn't want to be with someone tall, even threatened me that she would get a butt reduction if i keep planning to do this lol, but at the end of the day she got on board with it cause i made sure she got how important this was for me to do and all the mental pain it causes by me not doing it. If she doesn't understand you need to ask yourself will she eventually get on board, or if you can be happy being with her and not getting limb lengthening done. If she's a real one shell understand. If she's immature like my girl was it'll take a-lot of arguments and headaches for you to finally get her to realize what needs to be done. The scary thing about this too is you need someone positive to do this with. You always hear about the different experiences ppl had with someone supportive versus someone being negative or alone doing this. The fact that you can be open with her about this is a good sign tho in my opinion.
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Polvorón

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Since you have got a gf, I wonder why you are still considering LL.
Because most of people do this for themselves, not for other people.
Cosmetic surgeries and tattoos are a personal choice, having or not a GF or BF doesn't matter.
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Note: at this moment I'm only a "pretender", I want to know more about this interesting procedure. Hopping to become 185 cm (6'1'') from 174 cm (5'8 ½''), but it is too expensive.
My sitting height is 92½ - 94 cm (36''½ 37''), my length of legs is 81 cm (32'') and my armspan is 180 cm (70'' 7/8).

zaozari

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Never do this.
Why do you say that? (it's an honest question  I am not very experienced)
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zaozari

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #10 on: October 29, 2021, 05:44:38 PM »

Because most of people do this for themselves, not for other people.
Cosmetic surgeries and tattoos are a personal choice, having or not a GF or BF doesn't matter.
It's true  maybe speciallyif one has height dysphoria...I feel the neurosis even alone at home....
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Medium Drink Of Water

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #11 on: October 29, 2021, 06:33:20 PM »

Because most of people do this for themselves, not for other people.
Cosmetic surgeries and tattoos are a personal choice, having or not a GF or BF doesn't matter.

A lot of people here want LL only because of what other people will think.  Short guys who haven't had much success in love and career see people just as good or worse than them in every respect but height doing much better in life.

No way would I have done this to myself if not for others' height discrimination against me.
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Sambollio

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #12 on: October 29, 2021, 06:58:25 PM »

I think it depends on her reasoning, if she’s pissed because she’s worried about possible complications then I think that’s very understandable, just have an honest conversation with her and explain the safety to benefit ratio for you. If she’s mad that you are changing a part of yourself then you have to have a conversation Why you are doing this and maybe even if you guys will workout in the long term. Can you give more insight into what about it makes her upset?
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SpeedDialer

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #13 on: October 30, 2021, 06:53:11 PM »

How would you handle these questions?

1. I liked your old height better, it was perfect for me, why did you change?

2. Why did you keep this a secret from me? (not sure if I should say the truth- 'because I think you would have objected and given me more stress during the process')

3. Why did you risk your health? What if it affected your walking / able to do a job someday?

4. Why aren't you focusing more on applying to X school, this will delay your application by a year? (yes it will and I'm not sure what to say)

5. Do you have any other secrets? (yup, planning on hair transplant. Should I tell her?)
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SpeedDialer

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #14 on: October 30, 2021, 06:55:17 PM »

And don't forget

6. So you like taller girls/want to date someone else? (I want to be with my current GF. But unless I am able to get into a school near where she lives, I don't see how we could stay together. I don't think it is a good idea to say this thought aloud.)
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Medium Drink Of Water

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #15 on: October 30, 2021, 09:50:47 PM »

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1. I liked your old height better, it was perfect for me, why did you change?

For other people.  You may think it's fine but most other people think less of me because of my short stature.

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2. Why did you keep this a secret from me? (not sure if I should say the truth- 'because I think you would have objected and given me more stress during the process')

Because I was too cowardly to be forthcoming and honest with you.  I guess I need to learn to man up.

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3. Why did you risk your health? What if it affected your walking / able to do a job someday?

I was tired of all the height discrimination.  Mussolini said it's better to live one day as a lion than a hundred years as a sheep.  I have the opportunity to become a lion here and it's worth the risk.

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4. Why aren't you focusing more on applying to X school, this will delay your application by a year? (yes it will and I'm not sure what to say)

I realized that grad school is a waste of time and money.  I didn't want to be like that idiot Medium Drink Of Water who took out thousands and thousands of dollars in non-bankrupcy dischargable student loans just to find this out.

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5. Do you have any other secrets? (yup, planning on hair transplant. Should I tell her?)

In addition to not wanting to be short, I also don't want to be bald.  Gonna pay another several thousand dollars to get some hair grafts in the front here.

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6. So you like taller girls/want to date someone else? (I want to be with my current GF. But unless I am able to get into a school near where she lives, I don't see how we could stay together. I don't think it is a good idea to say this thought aloud.)

We might not be together much longer anyway.  I like you but it just might not work out.  I need to make sure I have good options in the future if we break up.
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SpeedDialer

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #16 on: October 31, 2021, 01:34:50 AM »

I have not done LL yet. I plan to do it in September. The title is to help me think through the possibilities.

Based on the responses, it seems like if I did LL and did not tell my GF, she would not like it.

So it seems like I should tell her that I am going to do it. I have not done LL yet, and I want to do internal femur Gnail with Giotikas next fall and then internal tibia maybe like a year later with Parihar. I've budgeted about 150k$ for both.

How would you tell your GF about this? I imagine something she'll be pissed about is me being stingy with money with her even though I had this money saved up. And she'll be annoyed because she likes my current height. Mentally, I'm already ready to get dumped but wonder if I can somehow say something to make this work.
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HateLAPELoveSTEM

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #17 on: October 31, 2021, 05:19:52 AM »

Because most of people do this for themselves, not for other people.
Cosmetic surgeries and tattoos are a personal choice, having or not a GF or BF doesn't matter.
I know but I was not talking about LL being not for just girls. But it'd be heartbreaking if you still wanna do LL, partnering with a GF. I've experienced my ex-gf's hatreds cuz I confessed I wanted to do LL and I was still feeling inferior, then she really pissed off.
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Medium Drink Of Water

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #18 on: October 31, 2021, 04:24:31 PM »

Based on the responses, it seems like if I did LL and did not tell my GF, she would not like it.

Yeah, not a good surprise for someone to get from someone they believe they're in a close relationship with.  If you keep that to yourself it's a red flag to her that she is not important in your life, and there's no gentle way to explain that away.  All your questions were in the past tense which made me think you were definitely planning to keep it a secret from her until after you got taller.

Quote
How would you tell your GF about this? I imagine something she'll be pissed about is me being stingy with money with her even though I had this money saved up. And she'll be annoyed because she likes my current height. Mentally, I'm already ready to get dumped but wonder if I can somehow say something to make this work.

It's good that you're prepared to get dumped because that's a possibility, but it's not guaranteed.  Several LLers I met in person had girlfriends/boyfriends at the time, and a few even came to visit them in the hospital.  One without even telling the guy she was coming.  He wasn't happy about that, actually.

You should tell her that you've been insecure about your height for a long time, that you feel like you don't get much respect from the world in general because you're short, that you've had this surgery in the back of your mind for years and decided to finally go for it before you have to spend any more years being short.  If you convince her that this has been a serious long-term mental/emotional problem for you, she'll probably be OK with your wanting to fix it.
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SpeedDialer

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #19 on: November 01, 2021, 10:41:12 PM »

Thanks for helping me think through this clearly

I will tell her everything after I book the surgery and I will mentally prepare myself to be dumped

I wonder if I should try to get dumped before the surgery happens because I think it would be more difficult emotionally to get dumped during the middle surgery. I vaguely remember reading that certain drugs you take during the recovery cause depression or negative thoughts. On the other hand, there is an off chance she will still be with me anyway.

What do you think? Should I try intentionally to get dumped before the surgery starts?
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LLprime3

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #20 on: November 02, 2021, 01:16:42 AM »

How would you handle these questions?

1. I liked your old height better, it was perfect for me, why did you change?
A: It's not a downgrade, it's objectively speaking an upgrade and improves my body ratio. [I wouldn't even get to the "perfect for me" part in my response. That's how focused I would be on that this whole thing is something that has only to do with me and is for me]

2. Why did you keep this a secret from me?
A: I should have told you beforehand, but it would not have changed my mind.
I didn't want to give you a chance to interfere in this personal choice. A greater height is universally an attractive trait. It's not a tattoo which is subjective.
[With that question people are actually only mad because they weren't involved in the process, not because of the decision itself. So one should concede a bit here.]

3. Why did you risk your health? What if it affected your walking / able to do a job someday?
A: I only live once, so I want to maximize all key areas in my personal life, appearance and personal development. This is overall not considered a risky procedure.
And if things really turn bad, you don't have to take the responsibility for what I did to me.

4. Why aren't you focusing more on applying to X school, this will delay your application by a year?
A: I will retire early anyway at some point, I don't have to live by a set schedule like everyone else.
[Maybe you should just go all in into crypto for 2 month before this 4 year cycle ends in order to cash out free bucks. That will convince her. It's a no-brainer]

5. Do you have any other secrets? (yup, planning on hair transplant. Should I tell her?)
A: -

6. So you like taller girls/want to date someone else?
A: I don't have any intention to go for any other girl [answering the question, and leading forward to the actual matter, as if the question has no weight], and I want you to cooperate with me on this temporary situation. In a year this will be all in the past.
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ask.me

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #21 on: November 04, 2021, 11:09:03 PM »

I don't think you should try to get dumped. Tell her how you feel, pretty much exactly as you've told us. What I mean is, explain why you want this, then tell her that if it's too much for her then you'd like to know before the surgery so you can deal with the break up before undergoing the process, rather than having to deal with both. If she isn't an  , she'll be honest and break it off, or at the very least, she won't dump you during LL.
« Last Edit: November 04, 2021, 11:30:38 PM by ask.me »
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zaozari

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #22 on: November 08, 2021, 02:17:39 PM »

Thanks for helping me think through this clearly

I will tell her everything after I book the surgery and I will mentally prepare myself to be dumped

I wonder if I should try to get dumped before the surgery happens because I think it would be more difficult emotionally to get dumped during the middle surgery. I vaguely remember reading that certain drugs you take during the recovery cause depression or negative thoughts. On the other hand, there is an off chance she will still be with me anyway.

What do you think? Should I try intentionally to get dumped before the surgery starts?

Just DON'T DO IT (LL) and start real dating right now!

Please check the today's zaozari post, his 4th in the topic with link below.
Don't risk your health, body function and waste money and time if you are 5"8....

http://www.limblengtheningforum.com/index.php?topic=68396.0
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Polvorón

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #23 on: November 08, 2021, 08:23:06 PM »

Just DON'T DO IT (LL) and start real dating right now!
Please, don't troll the forums.

If you don't like cosmetic limb lengthening, just don't do it.
Don't try to convince us about the convenience or not of CLL, because your point of view is only valid for you, other people can have other feelings (which they are also OK), and maybe they prefer to be taller because they like that idea.
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Note: at this moment I'm only a "pretender", I want to know more about this interesting procedure. Hopping to become 185 cm (6'1'') from 174 cm (5'8 ½''), but it is too expensive.
My sitting height is 92½ - 94 cm (36''½ 37''), my length of legs is 81 cm (32'') and my armspan is 180 cm (70'' 7/8).

zaozari

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #24 on: November 08, 2021, 09:41:28 PM »

I want to do LL. I am very very short.
But I feel this forum as a community and if I see that a lot of us who want LL because of girls, I feel obliged to share information like this in the relevant places . To share positive thinking (that girls seem not liking "giants"), and to make us all think (myself included). It's relevant here to know what girls want, in this thread it was even the very question posed. Each one is free to decide but LL is dangerous, expensive and costs time (it's my logic opinion and I have right to have it). In this case maybe the girl even breaks up.
If some forum's mates feel reassured and even give up that is their choice, not mine. Is LL not dangerous? Not expensive? Sone people like Unicorn got financially ruined and crippled. We should have all the facts available before deciding. But LL is their (each other) decision. If you want to go ahead ignoring everythin, not putting the right questions to doctors,  not preparing for complication surgeries, etc., , go ahead, you surely will find surgeons that will promise you 20 cm more (great, no?!) and others, like Paley that seem even not care about the problems with many people with Stryde.
But instead of wishing to silence me, why don't you find more positive contributions to the forum?
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Polvorón

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #25 on: November 08, 2021, 10:04:26 PM »

Everything has a risk, for example, I do not ride motorbikes, I prefer to "spend" that risk in a CLL surgery, because I prefer to be tall rather than riding a motorbike (it was just a example).

Don't tell other people what to do with their bodies, maybe you don't understand why a 5'8'' get this surgery, but... that person has his / her own reasons to do that. This is about our feelings, not about what other people think about our statures. Maybe some people like 5'8'', but I don't, so I would like to have this surgery done some day.
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Note: at this moment I'm only a "pretender", I want to know more about this interesting procedure. Hopping to become 185 cm (6'1'') from 174 cm (5'8 ½''), but it is too expensive.
My sitting height is 92½ - 94 cm (36''½ 37''), my length of legs is 81 cm (32'') and my armspan is 180 cm (70'' 7/8).

zaozari

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #26 on: November 08, 2021, 10:11:58 PM »

It's ok.
But I am not telling people what to do. When I write "please" or "don't do it!!" it is either an ironic, encouraging, hyperbole or a jokking order for them to do, I think everybody understands that.
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Polvorón

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #27 on: November 08, 2021, 10:21:30 PM »

Oh, the irony!

I'm sorry. :-[
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Note: at this moment I'm only a "pretender", I want to know more about this interesting procedure. Hopping to become 185 cm (6'1'') from 174 cm (5'8 ½''), but it is too expensive.
My sitting height is 92½ - 94 cm (36''½ 37''), my length of legs is 81 cm (32'') and my armspan is 180 cm (70'' 7/8).

zaozari

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Re: If GF pissed you did LL, then you do it again, what should you say to her?
« Reply #28 on: November 09, 2021, 02:46:50 PM »

Yes , ironic, optimistic and "provocative" in the good meaning of the word. I don't have the ambition to command adult's opinion about their own matters. And I respect your option  as everybody's else.

But when I know those things and "really" being short like me, not only in my opinion but also in all others' as well as doctors, anthropologists, etc, as standardised by science and health systems (2,3% shortest of the population and same sex or more than 2 standard deviations from the average), of course I think it is useful, I find it interesting to everybody here, as maybe around half of us want LL because of girls (directly or indirectly), more dominant, etc.

Don't read if you don't like.
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