Saturday 10/2 (2 days since surgery) extended:Especially, after going through surgery, you have a (somewhat) supportive network of nurses/doctors that you can reach out to around the clock, but really there's not a ton of emotional support. The hospital was 1.5 hours away from my home and, given the COVID situation, I hesitated to have my partner come and visit.
Those few days away were rough, for both me and them. I'd recommend that, if you have a partner and you deem it's safe for them to visit, that they do. Even holding hands occasionally while in bed would be been a comfort.
Upon arriving at home, I had a caretaker for the first 24 hours and then had a caretaker arrive the following night for 4 hours. I honestly think that caretaking helped me to build some confidence that otherwise may have been more nerve racking had my partner not been there, but I think you *can* get by without a caretaker as long as you have someone else (depending on progress in the hospital). I'd been taking very very baby steps on the walker in the hospital (maybe ~15 over 2 days) and had support because of intense leg pain.
Monday 10/4 (4 days since surgery):First day I've had without a caretaker. The one we initially hired didn't come but it was actually a blessing in disguise because it forced us to learn to do things independently. This was one of the most challenging parts for me while going into this surgery, especially with precice nails, as it was essentially signing away your independence for ~6 - 8 months. I value my independence above most things, such that I don't have to burden others. This is something you have mentally cope with and talk with your caregivers/family/partners about in advance.
A positive thing is that as you learn new skills (e.g. turns in your walker, greater standing strength, etc), you unlock the ability to do more things and it feels like a level up in a video game
Tuesday 10/5 (5 days since surgery):Today was a high point relative to the last 5 days. I just came out of PT and did some basic sit/stands, and well as flexed my knee joint. There's a decent amount of inflammation, even for a femur surgery, in the knees that you have to work out with speed. I honestly think that I have more in my life to appreciate now, as the basic sit/stands were somewhat tough but felt so exhilarating. All these basic automatic motions that my body used to make are now not necessarily in grasp yet, but are very attainable. This entire experience has shifted my perspective, about movement, eating, relationships, conversations -- it's been almost religious. I know I have a lot more to go, but I also know there are a lot of wins to be had in the future.
What I'd like to
HIGHLY recommend is moving around from bed => walker => wheelchair and vice versa as much as you physically can everyday, but especially the first 2 weeks out of surgery. The muscles in your body, from lack of use, will atrophy within 2 - 3 weeks if you don't, and that's bad news. I think was too heeding of advice to take it easy on my body the first few days, which is generally sound, but the alternative of not having legs to walk on or pushing through this intense surgical pain 1 month+ out of surgery was not something I'd like to consider. I'd like to tackle as much as I can, as soon as I can, please