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Author Topic: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?  (Read 1364 times)

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Dirona

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I was just thinking about  the lowest point in my journey of height dysphoria. I was feeling suicidal a few years ago but I came to know about LL and it sort of helped me. How was your journey? Did it ever get this bad at some point? Has  this community helped you knowing that there are other people who are depressed about this issue as well?
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Taking it easy

Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2021, 11:05:15 PM »

I've been suicidal for every second for 5 yrs simply because of height.
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Serilium

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2021, 11:26:23 PM »

I was never suicidal due to height, but I do feel the same in the way that LL did give my life some sort of 'hope' or 'relief'- relating to the fact that I can finally do something about my height....     

 - I thought I would have to live with this height forever before discovering LL and this made me look forward to the future for once.. With the old knowledge I definitely had dysphoria about the future
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Arcon

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2021, 02:59:09 AM »

Hi guys, if you feel like that ask for some professional advice from a psychologist, it will help a lot!
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2021, 04:13:23 AM »

Hi guys, if you feel like that ask for some professional advice from a psychologist, it will help a lot!
I'm an typical example of short men asking for shrinks' advices that I should strengthen my self-esteem myself and forget about height discriminations(although I don't know if those shrinks themselves managed to)and they ended the whole processes with 'encouraging' short celebrities like Deng Xiao Ping,Jack Ma(although he was not short at his age compared to his peers)and blah blah.
What you will get is some kind of pyschoactive medicine but what you have paid is $0.5k. 
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #5 on: May 03, 2021, 01:23:32 AM »

To be honest, I thought many times since my childhood (even almost tried many times), I never knew why exactly, I was always the shortest and the tiniest. Only at the pandemics (last year) I started to dig it out and found out I never liked and hated me by my look (height) and that was the major issue, but I loved who I was as person. I discovered why my ex cheated on me with my bestie who was taller than me (average height), and why other exs treated me like if I was just not that much, and I could feel and see it, I knew why my friends didn't give me that much attention and ""worship""? Or even voice. And why girls and female friends always said I was cute/beautiful and also a good sweet person, but would never give me a chance or hit me up. Since than my suicidal thoughts got worse and I think about it everyday and almost cry, I never went to the doctor, cause I know the bull they gonna say, but for me it's a big deal. CLL kind of got me a second chance of living and I'm going to save money from my 23 (right after grad) until 30-32 to do it and fix my issue. I'm always the shortest person in my university (but taller than some girls of course), and often girls ask me my height and compare to see if they are taller and that gets me into a bad  tty day. Being short sucks tbh and I hope the future generations change that mindset. And oftenly I get asked from patients "how old are you?" and etc (im a medical student), because I look like a kid, mostly cause of my height, and I feel people (and patients) don't trust me that much too, beacause I'm too short.

So yes, CLL got me with my heads up and focused at studies for some years.

Sorry for the english grammar and if it's confused, it hits my emotions and I'm not native english.

I'm not trying to seek atention, neither help, I'm just sharing.
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #6 on: May 03, 2021, 01:26:08 AM »

Yeah, they will try to change your mind to accept, and that's it. It's not like depression, it's just like "I don't want to live being like this"and that's all, at least for me
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #7 on: May 03, 2021, 04:34:49 AM »

To be honest, I thought many times since my childhood (even almost tried many times), I never knew why exactly, I was always the shortest and the tiniest. Only at the pandemics (last year) I started to dig it out and found out I never liked and hated me by my look (height) and that was the major issue, but I loved who I was as person. I discovered why my ex cheated on me with my bestie who was taller than me (average height), and why other exs treated me like if I was just not that much, and I could feel and see it, I knew why my friends didn't give me that much attention and ""worship""? Or even voice. And why girls and female friends always said I was cute/beautiful and also a good sweet person, but would never give me a chance or hit me up. Since than my suicidal thoughts got worse and I think about it everyday and almost cry, I never went to the doctor, cause I know the bull they gonna say, but for me it's a big deal. CLL kind of got me a second chance of living and I'm going to save money from my 23 (right after grad) until 30-32 to do it and fix my issue. I'm always the shortest person in my university (but taller than some girls of course), and often girls ask me my height and compare to see if they are taller and that gets me into a bad  tty day. Being short sucks tbh and I hope the future generations change that mindset. And oftenly I get asked from patients "how old are you?" and etc (im a medical student), because I look like a kid, mostly cause of my height, and I feel people (and patients) don't trust me that much too, beacause I'm too short.

So yes, CLL got me with my heads up and focused at studies for some years.

Sorry for the english grammar and if it's confused, it hits my emotions and I'm not native english.

I'm not trying to seek atention, neither help, I'm just sharing.

We are both wretches forgotten by God.I feel more miseries than you do cuz I'm only 163cm and I'm growing up in China,the most heightism country where if you don't grow tall enough you'll be 'transitioned' into disabilities by others.

In my country as the saying goes 'Men under 175cm(Nowadays 180cm) should be called 'disabilities'!',which at the same time keeps insulting both the disable and the short men.But I dunno why short women(even under 140cm)in my country can be considered as cute lolis.I think it's part because of imbalanced ratio of Chinese men and women.And Yea',nearly no women hit me up or got appealed by me.If it weren't my ex and now gf,I thought I'd already killed myself.

For Chineses,it seems as if a man is short,he is chainkiller or something.Anyway,he won't deserve social and romantic respects from others forever,although Chinese average height is not that tall even by now.

Anyway,I failed in suicides for 6 times.

But one thing I should warn you is Dr.LeeDonghoon's surgery is at higher price than even all of European surgeons'.I think you might as well turn to them for better cost performances.
« Last Edit: May 03, 2021, 05:01:13 AM by Coeus »
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Serilium

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #8 on: May 03, 2021, 04:39:35 AM »

Anyway,I failed in suicides for 5 times.
😳 wow 😭 u ok???..
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #9 on: May 03, 2021, 04:52:15 AM »

😳 wow 😭 u ok???..
I counted them wrong.

I tried jumping for 4 times and hanging for 2 times all at just 15 simply cuz of height.I'm also suffering from slight muscae volitantes.

Even in my gf's companion I've been also considering suicide for nearly 1 yr(only half year romance with my gf at present).

I'm also planning on gold nanoparticle muscae volitantes treatments coming in 5 yrs to kill all of the floaters in my eyeballs,which are also annoying me at the same time with my height dysphoria.

But I think solvable problems cannot be called problems like muscae volitantes.But height will be permanent pain that can not be killed by just medicine and fking shrinks for men.
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Serilium

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #10 on: May 03, 2021, 05:04:05 AM »

I counted them wrong.

I tried jumping for 4 times and hanging for 2 times all at just 15 simply cuz of height.I'm also suffering from slight muscae volitantes.

Even in my gf's companion I've been also considering suicide for nearly 1 yr(only half year romance with my gf at present).

I'm also planning on gold nanoparticle muscae volitantes treatments coming in 5 yrs to kill all of the floaters in my eyeballs,which are also annoying me at the same time with my height dysphoria.

But I think solvable problems cannot be called problems like muscae volitantes.But height will be permanent pain that can not be killed by just medicine and fking shrinks for men.

wow. u talk to therapist yet or not yet?
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RealLostSoul

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #11 on: May 03, 2021, 06:10:12 AM »

Yea quite a lot in my past but LL gives me hope and a reason to continue on.
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #12 on: May 03, 2021, 06:37:10 AM »

wow. u talk to therapist yet or not yet?
No and floater treatments doesn't need any therapist.But u are talking about LL then many LL surgeons do surgery for you and at the same time they will offer you therapists,which means you don't need worry anything about therapies.
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #13 on: May 03, 2021, 06:38:12 AM »

Yea quite a lot in my past but LL gives me hope and a reason to continue on.
It's the same with me.If there weren't LL I dunno how to continue my life.

In this goddamned modern society short men are being discriminated in all aspects every single moment.
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loia5tqd001

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #14 on: May 03, 2021, 07:35:53 AM »

Future Skycraper At least you're 168. I'm 10cm shorter than you. Even after 2 surgeries, I'll be only at your height. So terrible. The journey to get there is so long and after all the sacrifice I will still be below the average. Knowing that sucks like hell.
I've posted days ago about should I go +14 or +11. After days, I've experienced the suicidal thought too much that I'm now determined to go with the max regardless. With good clothing, I'll be fine with the proportion. Chaizo. https://imgur.com/a/14qPXUG
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #15 on: May 03, 2021, 08:19:52 AM »

Future Skycraper At least you're 168. I'm 10cm shorter than you. Even after 2 surgeries, I'll be only at your height. So terrible. The journey to get there is so long and after all the sacrifice I will still be below the average. Knowing that sucks like hell.
I've posted days ago about should I go +14 or +11. After days, I've experienced the suicidal thought too much that I'm now determined to go with the max regardless. With good clothing, I'll be fine with the proportion. Chaizo. https://imgur.com/a/14qPXUG
The maximum lengthening amount for height like yours is only 11cm,perhaps.You shoulda learned the shorter your bone lengths are,the fewer you can lengthen but there is no 100%.

Overlengthening will transition you into disable.
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loia5tqd001

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #16 on: May 03, 2021, 09:25:07 AM »

The maximum lengthening amount for height like yours is only 11cm.
That's why I need 2 surgeries with enough time apart.
Do 1 surgery, wait for the new bone to become my own bone. Do another one.
I've come to know someone went from 163 to 176 with TIBIA ONLY. 13cm in Tibia only is crazy and people say that he couldn't walk but no, he can lift 100+kg weights with his new legs. And the secret here is he was doing 2 surgeries with 9 years apart. The bone from the old surgery was already his own bone.
https://tuoitre.vn/di-tim-chieu-cao-mo-uoc-ky-2-hai-lan-keo-chan-cao-them-13cm-20201010110356253.htm
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #17 on: May 03, 2021, 10:30:06 AM »

That's why I need 2 surgeries with enough time apart.
Do 1 surgery, wait for the new bone to become my own bone. Do another one.
I've come to know someone went from 163 to 176 with TIBIA ONLY. 13cm in Tibia only is crazy and people say that he couldn't walk but no, he can lift 100+kg weights with his new legs. And the secret here is he was doing 2 surgeries with 9 years apart. The bone from the old surgery was already his own bone.
https://tuoitre.vn/di-tim-chieu-cao-mo-uoc-ky-2-hai-lan-keo-chan-cao-them-13cm-20201010110356253.htm
I understand your feelings like the shortest man in the world but I still wanna ruin your dreams about enough time affording you to do 13-14cm or something.You don't foresee both his and your futures after a huge amount lengthening and haven't yet experienced how acute symptoms you will cause to your body unless you can accept to be disable at your old ages.

Firstly maybe he is now healthy but who can predict his future?Secondly he is a special example thus you are likely not to become the same as him.Finally as long as your surgeon is reputable and of good responsiblity he won't advice you to lengthen by such a crazy amount.

Dr.Paley is always advicing patients not to lengthen tibias by no more than 5 and femur by no more than 7cm unless you choose his 3 option(or 4 option?Anyway that option can get you 16cm increasement by surgeries for 4 times and that's very costly not only for price but also for time).

And even that notorious Spanish surgeon is the same with Dr.Paley.

I'm not taller than you a lot for I'm only 163cm.But I think 12cm is a huge number for my body,and in addition I don't my body will permit this drastic lengthening.

So you should know safety is the first.Being disable but 190cm means nothing because you can't stand on the ground forever and you can't even hunt a job,which can destroy your life thoroughly.
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RealLostSoul

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #18 on: May 03, 2021, 11:14:10 AM »

Lengthening limits are set arbitrarily and not by biology. It's individually different, however, in the grand scheme of cases, you can see what is possible. I wouldn't expect to be an outstanding special case (both in a good and bad way). 13 cm tibia in one go? Nope. In 2 goes? Well, that's still a lot and will make you look odd as fk (even if you are 160cm you will have longer tibias than a natural 190cm male with the rest still being at 160cm level) but besides the possible complication of arthritis and biomechanical stuff in the future (debatable topic) if you recover well and there is no misalignment and nerves everything is fine you are probably good. If you are recovered there will be no soft tissue issues. Thinking about the long run is important but only to a certain degree. I wouldn't say ok I am only doing 4cm because my health is important. If your health is important then don't do LL period. If you want to pay the price and risk it to improve mental health you have to do a noticeable height change (which starts at about 5cm+) IMO.

I would advise doing something a lot of people have done in terms of limits. and set yourself a range of goals. Like from 13-16cm (requires 2-3 LLs) or something like that because in the end, you will have to decide once you know how good your body "lets you lengthen".

In general, most people who set crazy goals will do it once and stop. The surgery is such a hard thing that once you do it you will give up doing 3 CLLs and CAL (which is a joke)
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #19 on: May 03, 2021, 11:37:43 AM »

Yeah... And than you remember of dwarfs and etc...
I know it must hurt more for you, but I got you something here:

Got this from Dr. Lee


1. Femur lengthening – max. 8cm (3.15in.); lengthening period of 8cm is about
12 weeks

2. Tibia lengthening – max. 6cm (2.36in.); lengthening period of 6cm is about
12 weeks

3. Femur lengthening of 4cm then 6 months after another 4cm lengthening
(lengthening period of 4cm (1.57in.) is about 6 weeks)

4. Tibia lengthening of 4cm then 6 months after another 4cm lengthening
(lengthening period of 4cm (1.57in.) is about 8 weeks)

5. Femur or Tibia lengthening one leg at a time and lengthening the other leg
(max. lengthening length and lengthening period is same as #1 and #2)

6. Simultaneous tibia and femur lengthening (max 8cm (3.15in.) in total;
lengthening period of tibia and femur each lengthening up to 4cm is about 12
weeks in total)

7. Tibia lengthening up to 6cm then 1 year after femur lengthening up to 8cm
(max 14cm (5.51in.); up to 6cm tibia lengthening and up to 8cm femur
lengthening each takes about 12 weeks)

8. Simultaneous tibia and femur lengthening then at least 1 year after
additional simultaneous tibia and femur lengthening (max 16cm (6.29in.);
lengthening period of tibia and femur each lengthening up to 4cm is about 12
weeks)


Please buddy, don't give up, heads up and save money.
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #20 on: May 03, 2021, 11:42:58 AM »

Yeah, I know how it is, I lived amoung chineses for a time. The guys never cared about my height, cause I was cool and foreign, but never saw a girl looking me.

But please, don't give up, maybe everyone is born with a challenge, dwarfs, short guys, down's, really ugly people, people who can't walk, tallk, blind, etc. So heads up, work hard, study hard, save money as fk and go get your maximum. But do not suicide, work in your self buddy!

Maybe you can move to another country, like japan or other short ones. I always wanted to live at China or SK, but with my height even after LL I'm no that comfortable, so yeah. Talk to the CLL doctor and see everything.
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #21 on: May 03, 2021, 11:46:25 AM »

If you think she's the one, talk to her about your problems, but careful to not be so needy and etc. Keep the relation happy too. Maybe she has problems too and you two can overcome everything. If she leaves, she's not the one, and be happy.

Stay safe, stop trying to not be alive, try to think that yoour life is a super hard challenge, that tall and beautiful people have the easiest life, and that after everyone dies, you had the most challenging life, and at any relegion you would be higher value than them, so don't quit please.
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #22 on: May 03, 2021, 11:49:19 AM »

Yeah, true.

I think that 16cm is maximum, so you would be like 158cm+14/16cm= 172/174cm. That's more than japanese average.

And yes, it all depends at your body and comitiment, so start streching hard every day, and getting into good shape
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #23 on: May 03, 2021, 12:39:43 PM »

If you think she's the one, talk to her about your problems, but careful to not be so needy and etc. Keep the relation happy too. Maybe she has problems too and you two can overcome everything. If she leaves, she's not the one, and be happy.

Stay safe, stop trying to not be alive, try to think that yoour life is a super hard challenge, that tall and beautiful people have the easiest life, and that after everyone dies, you had the most challenging life, and at any relegion you would be higher value than them, so don't quit please.
She is only 140cm(can't taller in the least bit)and as old as me so she can't do anything but forgive my height.And she can accept men from 155cm to 165cm.I can always start and remain a happy talk with her so I don't need to suspect her love not like 155cm+ girls' loves to me.

In my hometown 175cm is really a good height even for millenials.Once I did military physical examination and in the end the average height of my peers who volunteered to be soldiers is only 170cm and no one was taller than 180cm.So I don't think 175cm is 'very short'(nearly all of Chinese netizens are calling 175cm tall men like this) as a millenial male.

I also have good appearance and rich family possession(The reason why I dind't grow tall is IUGR(intrautrine growth retardation,not genes or nultritions) so it's not hard for me to marry a woman there.

But I can't accept the truth that I didn't grow to genetically inherited height because of uncontrolled reasons.How poor I am!
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Future Skycraper

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #24 on: May 03, 2021, 01:43:46 PM »

Wow you're tall for her. That's good, mate!

Gotcha! Well, since you come from a rich family, you should consider getting a good doctor to get the maximum you want with less complications. And yes, 175cm is definetly not so short, it's more than average in lots of countries.

LOL porr you! In my case, my dad and mom are short, and doctor was kinda  ty, so...
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #25 on: May 03, 2021, 02:10:15 PM »

Wow you're tall for her. That's good, mate!

Gotcha! Well, since you come from a rich family, you should consider getting a good doctor to get the maximum you want with less complications. And yes, 175cm is definetly not so short, it's more than average in lots of countries.

LOL porr you! In my case, my dad and mom are short, and doctor was kinda  ty, so...
Thank u.But in my country 140cm tall girls are usually discriminating men under 175.I dunno what they are thinking.

I think couples with more than 15cm height difference are weird against scientific two genders' average heights.If a couple's height difference is 15cm then one's skull top point can only reach to the other's nose bottom.I dunno why many Chinese short girls think 175-180cm tall males can only match 140-150cm tall females and 180cm+ tall males can match 150-160cm tall females.
 
Im really convinced many girls are in very very high self-esteems and self-confidences that they don't believe 160cm tall male can be juxtaposed with 148-150cm tall females.And they also think,beautycamed them are real them.
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Canon

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #26 on: May 05, 2021, 10:08:34 PM »

I counted them wrong.

I tried jumping for 4 times and hanging for 2 times all at just 15 simply cuz of height.I'm also suffering from slight muscae volitantes.

Even in my gf's companion I've been also considering suicide for nearly 1 yr(only half year romance with my gf at present).

I'm also planning on gold nanoparticle muscae volitantes treatments coming in 5 yrs to kill all of the floaters in my eyeballs,which are also annoying me at the same time with my height dysphoria.

But I think solvable problems cannot be called problems like muscae volitantes.But height will be permanent pain that can not be killed by just medicine and fking shrinks for men.

What are floaters in eyeballs
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Astronomy

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #27 on: May 06, 2021, 07:25:53 AM »

What are floaters in eyeballs
U can know information about them googling pictures.
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Polvorón

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #28 on: May 09, 2021, 01:18:57 AM »

This is the reason because people should be serious when talking about this surgery. Journalists and bloggers should avoid to scare people about it with false myths, because this surgery is a hope for a lot of people who feel that they have the wrong* body. The procedure is not easy, it have some risks (that can be avoided or fixed most of times), but it is doable, and an increasing number of people are doing it.

*I don't mean that being short is wrong, I mean that a short body is wrong when the person doesn't like it. This "wrong" depends strongly on the feelings of the person.
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Note: at this moment I'm only a "pretender", I want to know more about this interesting procedure. Hopping to become 185 cm (6'1'') from 174 cm (5'8 ½''), but it is too expensive.
My sitting height is 92½ - 94 cm (36''½ 37''), my length of legs is 81 cm (32'') and my armspan is 180 cm (70'' 7/8).

HateLAPELoveSTEM

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #29 on: August 28, 2021, 09:29:50 AM »

Not to dump negative junks into this post but I really wanna admit:I'm suicidal per sec.

Yeah it's fking true height really sucks and it's kinda chronic and fatal disease but not thought as disease by ppl except u.
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ilovescience

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Re: How many of you thought about killing yourself at some point?
« Reply #30 on: August 29, 2021, 01:28:35 AM »

Life is not about height. You can still enjoy life even you are super short. Of course people love being taller, but not everyone is lucky to be tall. There are so many wonderful things in real life. You can still do lots of things despite of being short. You can travel around the world, do business you like to do, and enjoy your favourite meals.
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