Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

Please don’t listen to people telling you that it’s just not meant to be! Your girlfriend apparently loves you the way you are, and that’s the most important thing. I’m quite sure that your girlfriend’s mother will sooner or later accept you if you treat her daughter well. You shouldn’t do LL just to impress your girlfriend’s mother. Do it only if YOU are unhappy with your height.

By the way, your story is probably the saddest height discrimination story I’ve ever heard, and I think your girlfriend is really lucky to have a boyfriend like you (who is considering doing LL just to get her mother to accept him).

[.]

your story is probably the saddest funniest height discrimination story I’ve ever heard

Fixed it for you. 

[init1alove]

Hey 985er, only do LL for yourself.
I don't think it is worth doing LL to make your gf's mom to accept you.. Her mom cares about genes. It is even worse if you cheat on it.
Honestly, I also feel sad for my children if I give them short genes. I dont want my children to suffer this too.
Do you really make the decision to not have the babies?

[Astronomy]

Please don’t listen to people telling you that it’s just not meant to be! Your girlfriend apparently loves you the way you are, and that’s the most important thing. I’m quite sure that your girlfriend’s mother will sooner or later accept you if you treat her daughter well. You shouldn’t do LL just to impress your girlfriend’s mother. Do it only if YOU are unhappy with your height.

By the way, your story is probably the saddest height discrimination story I’ve ever heard, and I think your girlfriend is really lucky to have a boyfriend like you (who is considering doing LL just to get her mother to accept him).

Actually her mother knew I'd been treating her daughter like God Cuz my gf often communicates with her on phone or something else so her mother must have known that.So I thought that was not something about whether I treat her daughter well or not well.It's just everything about height.After all no mother-in-laws will pull one short man's hand into her door,for good gene.
And actually cuz of Chinese marriage culture,a hellva Chinese short men or women are being refused by mother-in-laws or other families for heights.I'm just one of them.
Anyway It's very upset for me to say LL is the only way out of this bad situation.

[Astronomy]

Hey 985er, only do LL for yourself.
I don't think it is worth doing LL to make your gf's mom to accept you.. Her mom cares about genes. It is even worse if you cheat on it.
Honestly, I also feel sad for my children if I give them short genes. I dont want my children to suffer this too.
Do you really make the decision to not have the babies?

Her mother won't be that smart anyway.Even though I had a short child she wouldn't blame me for gene so that she wouldn't think I was cheating her.
Really,both of me and my gf don't want any child cuz we both knew our bad genes but if her mother compelled us to have children....I would like to cheat her,like Chinese saying 'What has been done cannot be undone'

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

It’s your decision, but not having kids just because you and your girlfriend are short is pretty messed up. What if it’s a girl? Being short is not that big of a deal for girls. But even if it’s a boy, there are plenty of short guys whose life is awesome despite their height. Again, it’s your decision, but you shouldn’t miss out on the joy of having kids just because of “bad” genes. Because what’s next? Ugly couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be ugly too? Unintelligent couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be unintelligent too? Couples of certain ethnicities shouldn’t have children because their children might face racial discrimination?

[exceeding2meters]

It’s your decision, but not having kids just because you and your girlfriend are short is pretty messed up. What if it’s a girl? Being short is not that big of a deal for girls. But even if it’s a boy, there are plenty of short guys whose life is awesome despite their height. Again, it’s your decision, but you shouldn’t miss out on the joy of having kids just because of “bad” genes. Because what’s next? Ugly couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be ugly too? Unintelligent couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be unintelligent too? Couples of certain ethnicities shouldn’t have children because their children might face racial discrimination?

He is just being practical. He mentions he is 162 and he is gf is like 150. If they have a son, statistically speaking he ll probably end up less than 165. I am 165 and I can guarantee that life is crap, even here in northern Europe where height discrimination does not exist in such an extreme form.

If he has a daughter and she ends up 150,do you think this is not a problem? A girl being short is not as bad as a guy, but at the point of 150 I don't think it is nice

I wouldn't want to have my children needing to do LL, although if need to at least I would have been the guinea pig already

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

OK, it’s your decision, I don’t want to convince anyone to have kids if they think their kids might end up unhappy. But I think it’s sad that people feel they shouldn’t have kids just because of their height. 有匪君子‘s girlfriend is 148 cm, but is she miserable because of her height? Does she think her life is not worth living? Probably not. And who knows, maybe LL will be much safer and easier in 20 years’ time. Again, I don’t want to convince anyone to have kids, but be aware that there are few things in life that can bring you as much joy as becoming a parent and raising a child.

[Astronomy]

It’s your decision, but not having kids just because you and your girlfriend are short is pretty messed up. What if it’s a girl? Being short is not that big of a deal for girls. But even if it’s a boy, there are plenty of short guys whose life is awesome despite their height. Again, it’s your decision, but you shouldn’t miss out on the joy of having kids just because of “bad” genes. Because what’s next? Ugly couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be ugly too? Unintelligent couples shouldn’t have children because their children might be unintelligent too? Couples of certain ethnicities shouldn’t have children because their children might face racial discrimination?

It's disgusting that In China,parents are gods.They can unconditionally command thier offsprings to do all that they want and having children is the example.So we have to be faced with children's pain with our eyes and there ain't other ways...But if my mother-in-law did will want us to have a baby,only thing that we do is to raise him or her up with all kinds of cares.

[Astronomy]

He is just being practical. He mentions he is 162 and he is gf is like 150. If they have a son, statistically speaking he ll probably end up less than 165. I am 165 and I can guarantee that life is crap, even here in northern Europe where height discrimination does not exist in such an extreme form.

If he has a daughter and she ends up 150,do you think this is not a problem? A girl being short is not as bad as a guy, but at the point of 150 I don't think it is nice

I wouldn't want to have my children needing to do LL, although if need to at least I would have been the guinea pig already

Until today I've known maybe I had also been sacrificed for my parent's wedding...

[Astronomy]

OK, it’s your decision, I don’t want to convince anyone to have kids if they think their kids might end up unhappy. But I think it’s sad that people feel they shouldn’t have kids just because of their height. 有匪君子‘s girlfriend is 148 cm, but is she miserable because of her height? Does she think her life is not worth living? Probably not. And who knows, maybe LL will be much safer and easier in 20 years’ time. Again, I don’t want to convince anyone to have kids, but be aware that there are few things in life that can bring you as much joy as becoming a parent and raising a child.

Thx...If my children were destined to be bullied,discriminated or something else because of height,only thing we can do was to take good care of him or her mental and bring much joy to him or her.

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

You can never make sure that your child won’t be bullied. Even if YOU were tall, your child could still take after his mother (e.g., Will Smith’s son Jaden is way shorter than his father). Or if you used a sperm donation from a tall donor, your child could still end up, e.g., with a huge nose because the donor’s mom had a huge nose. Or there could be complications during birth and your child might end up mentally disabled. If you give your child enough love, he/she will be happy no matter what.

[Ascending]

I apologies for suggesting that very short people should consider carefully before marrying each other and I concede that this thinking is prejudicial.  To reproduce is a fundamental human right and so it should be.  To the OP - maybe if you spend some time with your girlfriends mother and she gets to know you then she may see past her prejudices.  I don't think you should do this surgery just for her.  It's a challenging, costly and a somewhat risky surgery and it won't really fix the problem - if she finds out that you had the surgery then she might feel you tried to cheat her and this will likely damage your relationship in any case.

[Astronomy]

You can never make sure that your child won’t be bullied. Even if YOU were tall, your child could still take after his mother (e.g., Will Smith’s son Jaden is way shorter than his father). Or if you used a sperm donation from a tall donor, your child could still end up, e.g., with a huge nose because the donor’s mom had a huge nose. Or there could be complications during birth and your child might end up mentally disabled. If you give your child enough love, he/she will be happy no matter what.

Fit what I was thinking!

[Astronomy]

I apologies for suggesting that very short people should consider carefully before marrying each other and I concede that this thinking is prejudicial.  To reproduce is a fundamental human right and so it should be.  To the OP - maybe if you spend some time with your girlfriends mother and she gets to know you then she may see past her prejudices.  I don't think you should do this surgery just for her.  It's a challenging, costly and a somewhat risky surgery and it won't really fix the problem - if she finds out that you had the surgery then she might feel you tried to cheat her and this will likely damage your relationship in any case.

In fact I'm to do this surgery for myself meanwhile.If it's empty enough for you,you can read my past posts and you shall know why I said 'I'm to do this surgery for myself meanwhile'.
So anyway her mother is a catalyzer.I just found a reasonable excuse for myself or I dunno why I would rather receive others' personal attacks to my height.But actually I'm indeed bombarded with misery from my height.
Guys above are right.I truly love her and I don't wanna give her up.
As for 'spend some time with her mother and she gets to know you then she may see past her prejudices.'...I knew of her temper and bad personality.So let's say No.
And I can guarantee even she found scars on my legs or I couldn't walk at normal speed or something else,it wouldn't inform her of LL .You and I can take it easy.Her mother didn't receive general education and can't speak a single English word.You know,China is always shutting away any piece of information about LL and her mother is always busy working that she couldn't spare time to surf on the Internet or TV(China is more strict with controlling information about LL on TV).So she wouldn't know I did this surgery.That's why I dare do LL to cheat her.

[Ascending]

In fact I'm to do this surgery for myself meanwhile.If it's empty enough for you,you can read my past posts and you shall know why I said 'I'm to do this surgery for myself meanwhile'.
So anyway her mother is a catalyzer.I just found a reasonable excuse for myself or I dunno why I would rather receive others' personal attacks to my height.But actually I'm indeed bombarded with misery from my height.
Guys above are right.I truly love her and I don't wanna give her up.
As for 'spend some time with her mother and she gets to know you then she may see past her prejudices.'...I knew of her temper and bad personality.So let's say No.
And I can guarantee even she found scars on my legs or I couldn't walk at normal speed or something else,it wouldn't inform her of LL .You and I can take it easy.Her mother didn't receive general education and can't speak a single English word.You know,China is always shutting away any piece of information about LL and her mother is always busy working.So she wouldn't know I did this surgery.That's why I dare do LL to cheat her.

Understood and good luck!

[Astronomy]

Understood and good luck!

Thx!

[Ghostfish]

Hi
I understand your situation and concerns, that push you to consider LL. However, if you do LL with 8cm or more, I am sure your gf's mom will notice it as well as many others.  How can you handle this situation?  Is there any perfect scenario?

[Astronomy]

Hi
I understand your situation and concerns, that push you to consider LL. However, if you do LL with 8cm or more, I am sure your gf's mom will notice it as well as many others.  How can you handle this situation?  Is there any perfect scenario?

My scenario is the best scneario.What I've said is that only me and my gf will know about this whole plan.I know I'll be noticed by others besides us but there ain't any explanation except that I grew taller thanks to my gene.
Chineses know very little about LL besides short ones and the education level of my gf's family is not high.I'd thank for China's banning the information about LL but take pity on other short people who haven't heard of this surgery.

[ZUCC420]

If you cannot guarantee your prospective offspring(s) with the fact that they won't suffer, be afflicted with illness, sadness, existential dread and injuries then you shouldn't be having kids in the first place.

Philosopher David Benatar presents in his book “Better Never to Have Been” an asymmetry that exists between existence and non-existence. I can not outline his whole work on here; I recommend reading his book if you want to know the big picture.

Put simply, the asymmetry illustrates how not existing is preferable over existing in any case. When you exist, you experience positive things, which is good, and negative things, which is bad. When you do not exist, you do not experience negative things, which is good. You also do not experience positive things, which is not bad, though, as not experiencing good things is only perceived as suffering when it is deprivation. Besides what are you being deprived of when you never had existed in the first place?

Not to mention they didn't even consented on being born in the first place.

Thus, non-existence is preferable as you do not experience suffering and are also not able to miss the delights you miss out on. To put it in a rather humorous way as an analogy: Have you ever felt pity for the poor non-existent inhabitants of Ernst Thälmann Island, for they can not behold the beautiful Caribbean beaches? How about the non existent incel that would be snooping around esoteric height growing or face fixing forums in the hopes of finding a girlfriend?

The only reason people reproduce is because of tradition and also because it feels good to fŭck which is one reason people tout the reproduce is "muh human rightz" (willingly passing on their sħitty disability inducing genetics thus condemning their children to a life of misery), had they even put in a modicum amount of thought none would be able to rationalize such a stupid decision in the first place.

Had you not existed you wouldn't have to worry about your height, your looks or women finding you attractive to begin with.

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

If you cannot guarantee your prospective offspring(s) with the fact that they won't suffer, be afflicted with illness, sadness, existential dread and injuries then you shouldn't be having kids in the first place.

No one should have children, then, because there is no guarantee. My wife’s co-worker and her husband are both perfectly healthy, intelligent, and attractive. Their first child is also perfectly healthy, intelligent, and attractive. Their second child was born with a congenital disease and will never be able to lead a normal life.

And yes, a really short couple will most probably have a short child. But even a tall couple can, in rare cases, have a short child. Although my wife is not short, she’s significantly shorter than her mom even though her dad is close to 200 cm (and yes, it’s her real dad because she looks very much like him), most probably because her grandmother is really short. Again, there’s no guarantee.

Plus, even if your child ends up short, he/she can still have a great life. Of course, you can’t assume that your child is going to become a pop star, but do you think that Bruno Mars or Ariana Grande would rather not exist? On the other hand, there are people whose life seems perfect but who are still depressed (e.g., Chris Cornell). Again, there’s just no guarantee.

The only reason people reproduce is because of tradition and also because it feels good to fŭck

When I was suffering from hypogonadism in my late teens, one doctor told me I might not be able to have children. At that time, I didn’t give a damn because, like you, I didn’t understand why someone would want to reproduce in the first place. Fortunately, that doctor was wrong, and everything went back to normal a few years later. Nowadays, I can say that being a father and watching my child grow up is the most beautiful thing in the world, and I’d rather be 150 cm than no longer be able to see my child smile at me when I wake up in the morning. So it’s not always all about tradition or the fact that it feels good to have sxx (which also feels good if your partner is on birth control).

(Just my two cents, I’m not looking to start another fight with you.) 

[.]

Height genes are pretty much random these days. You can have tall children even though you're short especially if you are Asian.

Look at the following example. How small the dad is on the right. And all the 3 sons are easily TALL AND BIG.

[Astronomy]

  Trust me guys we're not allowed to have no children.I've said both I and my gf don't wanna have any children because we know how miserable our children will be but we have no other alternatives.So please don't criticize.I know how stubborn her mother is.
  BTW genevariations are of little possibilities so don't illusion that.I do never let go of my gf because of our children being short.That's impossible i swear.If my children are as short as me I'll afford them to do LL or anything else but of course yet I hope they can grow healthily in mental and fall in love like me.But if height was the blockage,I'll help them.So unless we persuade her families out of having babies,we have to have babies,which fights against our willings.So whether we will have children is not our faults.So blahblah in this thread is meaningless(I also found this thread had stirred up some major problems...)

[precice strider]

  Trust me guys we're not allowed to have no children.I've said both I and my gf don't wanna have any children because we know how miserable our children will be but we have no other alternatives.So please don't criticize.I know how stubborn her mother is.
  BTW genevariations are of little possibilities so don't illusion that.I do never let go of my gf because of our children being short.That's impossible i swear.If my children are as short as me I'll afford them to do LL or anything else but of course yet I hope they can grow healthily in mental and fall in love like me.But if height was the blockage,I'll help them.So unless we persuade her families out of having babies,we have to have babies,which fights against our willings.So whether we will have children is not our faults.So blahblah in this thread is meaningless(I also found this thread had stirred up some major problems...)

There's also something called HGH.

[Astronomy]

There's also something called HGH.

HGH can only be used for those who are lack of GH(Actually I had a friend who did tell me that and of course he used HGH in the childhood) and I did research relative informantion long time ago for more height.

[precice strider]

Pretty sure you can use it for familial short stature.

I know of a guy (ghkid2019) who did HGH and got an inch. He would have gotten more had he started earlier. Endocrinologists in the US also prescribe HGH.

[Infinity]

"Who also needs this surgery for girlfriend's mother like me??"

No one. Because no one else is idiotic enough to think like that.

Aha the irony!! Isn't all of us are doing it for some idiotic reason or another? At least OP has a noble reason - they say 'everything is fair in love and war', On the flip side we can also say 'love is blind'

[ZUCC420]

No one should have children, then, because there is no guarantee. My wife’s co-worker and her husband are both perfectly healthy, intelligent, and attractive. Their first child is also perfectly healthy, intelligent, and attractive. Their second child was born with a congenital disease and will never be able to lead a normal life.

And yes, a really short couple will most probably have a short child. But even a tall couple can, in rare cases, have a short child. Although my wife is not short, she’s significantly shorter than her mom even though her dad is close to 200 cm (and yes, it’s her real dad because she looks very much like him), most probably because her grandmother is really short. Again, there’s no guarantee.

Plus, even if your child ends up short, he/she can still have a great life. Of course, you can’t assume that your child is going to become a pop star, but do you think that Bruno Mars or Ariana Grande would rather not exist? On the other hand, there are people whose life seems perfect but who are still depressed (e.g., Chris Cornell). Again, there’s just no guarantee.

When I was suffering from hypogonadism in my late teens, one doctor told me I might not be able to have children. At that time, I didn’t give a damn because, like you, I didn’t understand why someone would want to reproduce in the first place. Fortunately, that doctor was wrong, and everything went back to normal a few years later. Nowadays, I can say that being a father and watching my child grow up is the most beautiful thing in the world, and I’d rather be 150 cm than no longer be able to see my child smile at me when I wake up in the morning. So it’s not always all about tradition or the fact that it feels good to have sxx (which also feels good if your partner is on birth control).

(Just my two cents, I’m not looking to start another fight with you.)

Yap all of this is addressed in the video I linked, which is just another post hoc rationalization.

Like Stardusk said they could produce thousands of studies detailing how parents are unhappy than non parents of the same age but people will still reproduce because it is inevitably a result of our evolution, it's coded in the DNA of the majority of people to want to have kids as ultimately people's instincts supplants reason.

[.]

Aha the irony!! Isn't all of us are doing it for some idiotic reason or another? At least OP has a noble reason - they say 'everything is fair in love and war', On the flip side we can also say 'love is blind'

Bull . What are you? 12 year old?

[NotSoBigBadBruin]

Yap all of this is addressed in the video I linked, which is just another post hoc rationalization.

Like Stardusk said they could produce thousands of studies detailing how parents are unhappy than non parents of the same age but people will still reproduce because it is inevitably a result of our evolution, it's coded in the DNA of the majority of people to want to have kids as ultimately people's instincts supplants reason.

I don’t think that having kids is for everyone, and I’m sure that some parents would be happier if they didn’t have kids. But for me, seeing my child smile is the highest form of happiness I’ve ever experienced. I wouldn’t trade this feeling for anything in the world, and no philosopher or study can convince me otherwise. It’s somehow comparable to the feeling of giving a gift to someone you love and seeing how happy it is making them—just a thousand times more intense.

When I was suffering from hypogonadism, I also had some serious spells of depression and spent a few weeks in the hospital. It was a terrible time, but it did not make me wish I had never been born. Imagine going on a two-week vacation and having a terrible first day—it’s raining, your wallet gets stolen, etc. But the rest of your vacation is just awesome—lots of sunshine, parties, great food, etc. At the end of your vacation, would you regret having gone on vacation in the first place just because the first day was terrible?

Just another example, an old friend of mine (who was a real Chad in high school) had a motorcycle accident in his early twenties and has been confined to a wheelchair since. He was severely depressed for at least two to three years following his accident before he turned his life around. Nowadays he’s one of the happiest guys I know. He has a beautiful daughter and wife and is one of the most successful Paralympic athletes in the world.

As a parent, you can never guarantee that your child will always be happy, but there’s a lot you can do to make sure that there’s more light than darkness in your child’s life and that they will lead a happy and fulfilling life despite any potential challenges and adversities. But again, just because raising my child is the best thing in the world for me, doesn’t mean that everyone needs to have children in order to be happy.

[Astronomy]

I don’t think that having kids is for everyone, and I’m sure that some parents would be happier if they didn’t have kids. But for me, seeing my child smile is the highest form of happiness I’ve ever experienced. I wouldn’t trade this feeling for anything in the world, and no philosopher or study can convince me otherwise. It’s somehow comparable to the feeling of giving a gift to someone you love and seeing how happy it is making them—just a thousand times more intense.

When I was suffering from hypogonadism, I also had some serious spells of depression and spent a few weeks in the hospital. It was a terrible time, but it did not make me wish I had never been born. Imagine going on a two-week vacation and having a terrible first day—it’s raining, your wallet gets stolen, etc. But the rest of your vacation is just awesome—lots of sunshine, parties, great food, etc. At the end of your vacation, would you regret having gone on vacation in the first place just because the first day was terrible?

Just another example, an old friend of mine (who was a real Chad in high school) had a motorcycle accident in his early twenties and has been confined to a wheelchair since. He was severely depressed for at least two to three years following his accident before he turned his life around. Nowadays he’s one of the happiest guys I know. He has a beautiful daughter and wife and is one of the most successful Paralympic athletes in the world.

As a parent, you can never guarantee that your child will always be happy, but there’s a lot you can do to make sure that there’s more light than darkness in your child’s life and that they will lead a happy and fulfilling life despite any potential challenges and adversities. But again, just because raising my child is the best thing in the world for me, doesn’t mean that everyone needs to have children in order to be happy.

To cover,parents with bad genes shoulnd't have children or that'll really screw up your children.Don't let'em reexperience your pain and there's also no meaning to pass on dwarflike genes.That's what I thought so that's my mother-in-law's fault.