Hello,
Your answer did not disappoint, I was waiting for your response as always.
Look, I've literally never mentioned it before nor tried to explain the deepest of my feelings to anyone else, but now; I want to share my thoughts about life.
I've been growing up with fashion walks, watching them all day, trying to design my own clothes, trying to make my OWN clothing brand.
Since my brain is completely washed due to the fashion trends like being tall as modelling, always choosing tall people to post a picture when you try to promote your products, the average height of models, people who are taking a role on fashion walks, they all literally washed my whole brain.
Now, I feel like i'm at a point where my standarts are too fkn high than they should be due to the impact of my interests. I know, 174cm is not that bad to be honest, no-one literally called me short, i was the alpha male during my entire school career, literally more than 20 girls LOVED me, due to my physical appereance and my character (i'm so talkative and funny irl, i'm mostly cold towards men but i get along with females insanely good)
So, i'm doing this for myself brother. I want to be at the top. 185cm. Literally could pull any kind of stuff I want to wear off. Now, with this height, I CANT even pull of any fkn thing. The stuff I want to wear are extreme. Literally the pieces from fashion walks where people think those outfits are too weird to use in a daily life. This is my life, this is where my brain's growth ended up, this is the last point where my THOUGHTS ended up.
I couldn't care less about FEMALES or any other fkn crap . I just wanna be tall and physically PERFECT. In my entire life, i've never been into relationships anyway. I don't even wanna fk. I have a relationship which has been going for 3 years and I didn't even have sxx with her. She literally has the perfect body, that's how FAR i am into relationships and sxx.
(don't misunderstand me, don't say that if you were too far away from relationships why tf do you have a gf since 3 years ago? well, although i got tons of offers from girls to be their boyfriend, i literally rejected them all. I only had 2 relationships irl, one lasted for 2 years, and the second one is still going on since 3 years, whatever)
and i'm not saying these stuff to flex, i'm just saying them to make you realise FEMALES DONT MEAN ANYTHING TO ME, IT DOESNT MATTER.
I'm not old btw, I'm lying about my age most of the time. I literally am a teenager. And I want to be perfect. The only thing fks it up is my height. I can't imagine how good it would be for me to be above 6 ft. I'd literally be godlike. And, there are plenty of people who want to be average, why can't i just wish to be godlike?
The only thing about this procedure is the RISKs, you can always tell me this: You said that you want to be perfect, what if you fk your legs up and you hate yourself forever?
Well, that's also possible. I need to take risks and if everything goes well in 2 3 years, i'll also go for tibias.
Best Regards
no hate btw, please
also i'll be 18 soon. I'm under 18, don't ban me please.
edit: I'm not being greedy or anything. I'm not having intentions of doing cross lengthening. If everything goes well on femurs (7 cm) which is a REALISTIC amount.
i'll also go for 5 cm on tibias which is ALSO realistic.
edit2: I have suicidal thoughts. I only live once, and I want to push the limits with REALISTIC goals.
edit3: I'm spending my whole days reading diaries here and being obsessed even more and more. I have an uni enterance exam this year. and I dont know no crap about lessons. Although i'm clever and i'm in a high school where only the %4 of the middle school students were able to sign up. I'm literally wasting my intelligence, my life, my joy. ALL OF THIS BECAUSE OF MY FKN HEIGHT