Topic: Fear of being disappointed (Read 2879 times)

Knik · « **on:** July 19, 2017, 08:44:45 AM »

Am I the only one to be afraid to see no change after the operation?

rasteride · « **Reply #1 on:** July 19, 2017, 08:58:43 AM »

This is my biggest fear. I can deal with the financial hit, can somewhat deal with the time and can probably swallow my anxiety enough to be able to anticipate complications, but to go through all that and STILL be disappointed with my self image? That's something I don't think I can handle easily.

Knik · « **Reply #2 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:02:42 AM »

and also the fear to be disproportionnal
when I'm looking at 7,5 cm (max safe amount for tibias) it seems ok, but on a human ?
that would make me be 179-180 and it's still consider as short by many people (I know it is not, but still)

rasteride · « **Reply #3 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:08:17 AM »

I'm not worried too much about proportions. I don't even really notice them on most people, so unless it's like 10+cm, I don't think you should worry too much. There are people with long tibias, long femurs, long arms and long torsos. I think 3 inches is within a reasonable amount of length in terms of proportions. In the grand scheme of things, 3 inches is really nothing... it's essentially the size of 1 and 1/2 credit card width, so most people will not notice anything unless they REALLY look. Even then, you'll just be a somewhat long tibia'd person.

Anyway, we're constantly moving in real life anyway, and nobody really stands straight up for long periods of time, so it will be noticed even less. Heck, even LL in general, I believe, is more about your own inner image of yourself rather than how the external world perceives you. 2-3 inches won't really change your life that much in terms of how the world treats you, but it might make you satisfied with who you are enough that you gain confidence to become a better person.

Knik · « **Reply #4 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:10:16 AM »

Yes, it's true
Anyway the doctor can advice about it

biggerdreams · « **Reply #5 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:11:39 AM »

If you're below average or average you probably won't ever feel tall in a superior way but if you're below average the reward is worth the risk which has been discussed many times in this forum.

Take the time to think through all scenarios to see if this is something for you.

KiloKAHN · « **Reply #6 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:13:41 AM »

It's a possibility that after CLL you will get into a cosmetic surgery frenzy. It seems to be somewhat common because it's insecurity that drives most people to go through this surgery in the first place.

rasteride · « **Reply #7 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:20:48 AM »

I think in the end, it's not something you should do on a whim. You should exhaust every possible means to cure your dysphoria before even considering this surgery AND I think it's something that needs time to reflect upon. Give it 2-3 years. Maybe you'll be cured by then, or your life will be at a point where it really doesn't matter. This is especially true for guys of average height, since they will never really be discriminated for their height. See a psychologist, try to be more active in your life, try to be better at things you can control. Heck, maybe even gaining temporary height via lifts or Yoga or glucosamine will be enough to satisfy you.

Height is only one aspect of who you are, and truthfully, the people who will really matter in your life are the ones who won’t care about your height. If you're gonna get LL, do it because you want to, not because you think you need it to succeed in the world.

Knik · « **Reply #8 on:** July 19, 2017, 09:42:08 AM »

Quote from: rasteride on July 19, 2017, 09:20:48 AM

I think in the end, it's not something you should do on a whim. You should exhaust every possible means to cure your dysphoria before even considering this surgery AND I think it's something that needs time to reflect upon. Give it 2-3 years. Maybe you'll be cured by then, or your life will be at a point where it really doesn't matter. This is especially true for guys of average height, since they will never really be discriminated for their height. See a psychologist, try to be more active in your life, try to be better at things you can control. Heck, maybe even gaining temporary height via lifts or Yoga or glucosamine will be enough to satisfy you.

Height is only one aspect of who you are, and truthfully, the people who will really matter in your life are the ones who won’t care about your height. If you're gonna get LL, do it because you want to, not because you think you need it to succeed in the world.

Read my other topic. I took some month to try to overcome my dyasphora. It was ok, but I'm still insecure. More now that a girl told me she is taller than me and her father would dislike me for that (yes I know, it's stupid)
during this month I was insisting on sport, foods and having a nice lifestyle. To be honest my mom is not helping me for that, but it is ok as I grew up

onemorefoot · « **Reply #9 on:** July 19, 2017, 03:30:48 PM »

You Will see chance surely, foro your options I would recommend you to stay in Italy.

google42 · « **Reply #10 on:** July 19, 2017, 03:42:22 PM »

Try wearing some lifts, see if you like it, and then decide if it's worth it doing ll.

Penguinn · « **Reply #11 on:** July 19, 2017, 03:48:11 PM »

Quote from: theophilo on July 19, 2017, 09:02:42 AM

and also the fear to be disproportionnal
when I'm looking at 7,5 cm (max safe amount for tibias) it seems ok, but on a human ?
that would make me be 179-180 and it's still consider as short by many people (I know it is not, but still)

Who said 7.5 is the safe limit for tibias?

Knik · « **Reply #12 on:** July 19, 2017, 04:07:17 PM »

Quote from: Penguinn on July 19, 2017, 03:48:11 PM

Who said 7.5 is the safe limit for tibias?

maybe it's less
but from what I see most doctors don't go over 7,5 cm for tibias
am I right ?

Knik · « **Reply #13 on:** July 19, 2017, 04:10:10 PM »

It's just I don't know if I'm ready to wait all that time to collect money for Italy, everyday it's worse
but it's another topic

biggerdreams · « **Reply #14 on:** July 19, 2017, 05:13:24 PM »

Quote from: theophilo on July 19, 2017, 04:10:10 PM

It's just I don't know if I'm ready to wait all that time to collect money for Italy, everyday it's worse
but it's another topic

All things worth having takes time.

Body Builder · « **Reply #15 on:** July 19, 2017, 08:13:51 PM »

If with 6-6.5 cm and a morning height of 5.11 you are not ok, then don't bother wasting money and time.
Go to a shrink on the first place.

LL is not for people who are generally not ok with themselves but for people who know that their only problem with themselves is their height.
Everyone else needs mental help, not cosmetic surgeries.

Knik · « **Reply #16 on:** July 19, 2017, 08:16:01 PM »

Quote from: Body Builder on July 19, 2017, 08:13:51 PM

If with 6-6.5 cm and a morning height of 5.11 you are not ok, then don't bother wasting money and time.
Go to a shrink on the first place.

LL is not for people who are generally not ok with themselves but for people who know that their only problem with themselves is their height.
Everyone else needs mental help, not cosmetic surgeries.

Famous mental disease

Christopherbulder · « **Reply #17 on:** July 19, 2017, 11:06:41 PM »

hello 6.5 OR 7 cm is big difference
depend of you tall before 173 CM IS PERFECT FOR CHANGE CATEGORIE YOU DONT LOOK MORE SHORT GUY IN AMERICA IN EUROPE IN CHINA

IwannaBeTaller · « **Reply #18 on:** July 20, 2017, 12:19:22 AM »

I believe that in regards to your self-perception of your physical stature, LL will definitely be an improvement. This procedure will make you taller, and you will definitely notice the height boost in everyday life (unless you only lengthen 1 cm or something). The only danger stems from the feeling that the change is not enough, becuse you're still unhappy with your height. But if you're worried that nothing at all will change, I believe you can put that worry to rest. LL will make you taller, and if you are conscious about your height, it will improve the situation to some degree. If that degree is enough is an entirely different question.

RealTrump · « **Reply #19 on:** July 20, 2017, 05:53:36 AM »

Best bang for the buck and least amount of disappointment goes to:

5'4 - 5'7 group.

One surgery, 6-8cm on the femurs. Can jump to 5'7 - 5'10.

I used to think about my height everyday. Now I just feel normal, and it feels good.

Thatdude950 · « **Reply #20 on:** July 20, 2017, 06:58:30 AM »

That's the rational, realistic side of your brain trying to break through those dreamlike visions of an ideal future self that the desperate, naive pre-surgery person has

LISTEN TO IT AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE

The Kaiser · « **Reply #21 on:** July 20, 2017, 11:09:05 AM »

Quote from: theophilo on July 19, 2017, 09:02:42 AM

and also the fear to be disproportionnal
when I'm looking at 7,5 cm (max safe amount for tibias) it seems ok, but on a human ?
that would make me be 179-180 and it's still consider as short by many people (I know it is not, but still)

7.5 cm tibia is too much, its not safe at all. tibia by itself more complex than femur, just to put u in image

Chris · « **Reply #22 on:** July 22, 2017, 07:48:46 PM »

Quote from: theophilo on July 19, 2017, 04:10:10 PM

It's just I don't know if I'm ready to wait all that time to collect money for Italy, everyday it's worse
but it's another topic

If I was 173cm like you, I wouldn't even think about collecting money

That being said, I'm only one inch taller now, going from 161cm to 163,5cm.
At first, I was euphoric and even defended the doctors who f*cked up my surgery.
Then reality caught me again and I noticed that nothing really changed in my life except for that now everyone knows about my height issues, because I underwent this unsuccessful procedure quite openly.
I'm disappointed and sometimes even frustrated, because I endured and suffered a lot, spent a lot of money (from the perspective of a poor university student) on a cheap team of surgeons and I still don't have what I desire the most: peace in my mind. I think it doesn't matter whether we are 160, 170 or even 180, this is what it feels like after LL if you don't get what you have expected.
The only bright side for me, I'm the same height as the short girls now, which suddenly works wonders

But I doubt that any other taller person would at least have something like this as a solatium.

Think thoroughly about what you REALLY can expect to change after your height gain. This is the only way to not be disappointing after LL.

Limb Lengthening Forum

Author Topic: Fear of being disappointed (Read 2879 times)