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Author Topic: Telling parents  (Read 7339 times)

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TrueSpartan

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Telling parents
« on: October 15, 2016, 05:40:49 PM »

Hello forum,

I have been around this forum for a few years now. I will be graduating from university very soon and I am planning on pursuing LL right after graduation. I have a question for those who are seriously pursuing this or have already gone through this procedure. I will be telling my mom and dad about this soon. In my eyes, I have to tell them since I will be disappearing for a good 8 months or so. How did you guys start this conversation with your parents?

Ps. I have also heard of conflicting advice. Some people have told me that telling there parents and having there support really helped them in this process. Others have said that telling them was the worst decision they ever made.  If your a veteran, can you tell me how your parents reacted?

Thanks

Truespartan
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onemorefoot

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #1 on: October 15, 2016, 06:11:00 PM »

They dont support you financially, you have not to tell them, just go away with a good trained doctor(dont do more than 6 cm per segment) knowing that complications can happen but if you surgeon knows what he/she is doing he/she will resolve it well without extra cost, in some cases. If you feel better telling them do it fast, they maybe get upset and tell you are crazy because most of the people are ignorant about this procedure, try to explain this surgery and if they understand well if not ,too. Some surgeons wont allow you to do this surgery at least one of your family member knows about it, but it is just in some cases, money is their main concern.
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Budget will determine my future.

Whereintheworld?

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #2 on: October 15, 2016, 06:20:39 PM »

It depends on how private you want to keep this.
If your parents know, it's only a matter of time before they let it slip.
I'd say that especially since you're just finishing college, the idea of you being away from home for a year or so isn't really too suspicious.
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #3 on: October 15, 2016, 06:27:28 PM »

It depends on how private you want to keep this.
If you're parents know, it's only a matter of time before they let it slip.
I'd say that especially since you're just finishing college, the idea of you being away from home for a year or so isn't really too suspicious.

If he will lengthen more than 5cm then i highly doubt it that they won't notice.
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Whereintheworld?

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #4 on: October 15, 2016, 06:35:24 PM »

True, but I'm guessing that he's 21/22, which means they'll probably write it off as a natural growth spurt.
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #5 on: October 15, 2016, 06:36:56 PM »

Well i thought about something similar but unfortunely they already got an information that i won't grow anymore.

Anyway, telling your parents will be probably the easiest thing with LL.
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onemorefoot

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2016, 06:44:58 PM »

Late growth spurts are great arguments.
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TIBIKE200

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #7 on: October 15, 2016, 06:50:02 PM »

It's your family... Tell them... There is no question about that
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The Kaiser

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #8 on: October 15, 2016, 07:00:52 PM »

Hello forum,

I have been around this forum for a few years now. I will be graduating from university very soon and I am planning on pursuing LL right after graduation. I have a question for those who are seriously pursuing this or have already gone through this procedure. I will be telling my mom and dad about this soon. In my eyes, I have to tell them since I will be disappearing for a good 8 months or so. How did you guys start this conversation with your parents?

Ps. I have also heard of conflicting advice. Some people have told me that telling there parents and having there support really helped them in this process. Others have said that telling them was the worst decision they ever made.  If your a veteran, can you tell me how your parents reacted?

Thanks

Truespartan

why 8 months off!! don't tell me you want to seek 12 cm
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #9 on: October 15, 2016, 07:02:00 PM »

Maybe he wants to stay for a consolidation time.
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The Kaiser

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #10 on: October 15, 2016, 07:06:20 PM »

Maybe he wants to stay for a consolidation time.

even tough i think 6-7 months is enough to walk unassisted
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Auron

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #11 on: October 15, 2016, 07:27:40 PM »

why 8 months off!! don't tell me you want to seek 12 cm
Or maybe he wants to lengthen 1 leg each time.
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The Kaiser

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #12 on: October 15, 2016, 07:35:49 PM »

Or maybe he wants to lengthen 1 leg each time.

not a good idea, wasting a lot of time
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Auron

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #13 on: October 15, 2016, 08:04:24 PM »

not a good idea, wasting a lot of time
I'm no doctor so I don't know. I think it has its pros and cons.
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TrueSpartan

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #14 on: October 15, 2016, 08:08:04 PM »

Hello guys,

Thank you for replying to my post. I am 24 (170cm - 172cm) and I plan on doing 5.5 cm Latn tibia. I plan to stay close to the doctor until consolidation is mostly complete. For LATN, this is about 1.5 months/cm and that is why I will be abroad for 8 months.

The reason I am considering telling my parents is in the case of complications. Plus I figure they will know when I return home. A lot of people on this forum seem to be seeking this surgery. So my question is have you told your parents about this procedure, how did you tell your parents? What was there reaction etc.

Thank you,

TrueSpartan
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onemorefoot

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #15 on: October 15, 2016, 08:26:03 PM »

Where are you doing LATN? Why not LON? 5.5 seems reasonable, I only told my mom and he is supporting me financially, my father doesnt know, she didnt get crazy. I consider her above average talking about logical skils.
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Morissette

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #16 on: October 15, 2016, 08:34:24 PM »

My parents were the first too know. They thought I was crazy at first but they ended up supporting me all the way even lending me money to make this possible. My dad came to India with me to help me settle in aswell. Parents will either make you or brake you in life
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #17 on: October 15, 2016, 08:55:04 PM »

I only told my mom and he is supporting me financially, my father doesnt know, she didnt get crazy.

They thought I was crazy at first but they ended up supporting me all the way even lending me money to make this possible. My dad came to India with me to help me settle in aswell.

Where all of you get your parents from?

My would probably destroy me mentally if i would even mention anything about LL...

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Mtall

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #18 on: October 15, 2016, 08:56:22 PM »

Don't do LATN. Do LON or full externals.

Also....are you going away from your home country?
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Morissette

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #19 on: October 15, 2016, 09:12:27 PM »

Canada hahaha I guess it's more of a question of how much of an open mind they would have. If it wasn't for my mom idk if my dad would have come around so quickly either way I'm glad they did it helps a lot having them support you intead of criticize
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Bander72

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #20 on: October 15, 2016, 10:02:16 PM »

You have Lived with and and know your parents well. Like all of us you probably have a gut feeling of how they would react. Go with that because that Is likely what would happen.
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The Kaiser

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #21 on: October 16, 2016, 09:49:56 AM »

Hello guys,

Thank you for replying to my post. I am 24 (170cm - 172cm) and I plan on doing 5.5 cm Latn tibia. I plan to stay close to the doctor until consolidation is mostly complete. For LATN, this is about 1.5 months/cm and that is why I will be abroad for 8 months.

The reason I am considering telling my parents is in the case of complications. Plus I figure they will know when I return home. A lot of people on this forum seem to be seeking this surgery. So my question is have you told your parents about this procedure, how did you tell your parents? What was there reaction etc.

Thank you,


even if you didn't tell them they will not know about the surgery, they will be blown!! because they can not describe what just happened. but telling me they will know when you get home is a false statement

TrueSpartan
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Penguinn

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #22 on: October 16, 2016, 10:51:46 AM »

Only you know how your parents will react. My dad's the one who told me about LL- he wasn't serious but wasn't joking either- and I went "that's crazy!" Then I read about it and decided I wanted it. They paid for it & were supportive because I'm really short. If I was average and wanted this, they would've taken me for some electric shocks..or just told me to f*ck off.


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The Kaiser

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #23 on: October 16, 2016, 11:16:44 AM »

no way your parents will now, they will blown!! because they can describe the situation, but they know is a false statement
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #24 on: October 16, 2016, 11:51:28 AM »

If I was average and wanted this, they would've taken me for some electric shocks..or just told me to f*ck off.

Change average to short and it will sound like my parents lol.
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Whereintheworld?

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #25 on: October 16, 2016, 12:45:49 PM »

I haven't and don't intend to tell my parents. I really don't think they'll notice either (my dad is around 6'3 and my mom is 5'9 plus shes always in heels of some sort)

I should also add that my family is not particularly close, I haven't seem many of them in years.
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YourSpaceBoyfriend

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #26 on: October 16, 2016, 01:03:47 PM »

I haven't and don't intend to tell my parents. I really don't think they'll notice either (my dad is around 6'3 and my mom is 5'9 plus shes always in heels of some sort)

I should also add that my family is not particularly close, I haven't seem many of them in years.

How old are you?

As i remember you were 5'7 or something right?
If your mom is like 5'9 and you will do LL she will spot that you are not shorter than her anymore.
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Bigpoppapump

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #27 on: October 16, 2016, 01:33:11 PM »

Only you know how your parents will react. My dad's the one who told me about LL- he wasn't serious but wasn't joking either- and I went "that's crazy!" Then I read about it and decided I wanted it. They paid for it & were supportive because I'm really short. If I was average and wanted this, they would've taken me for some electric shocks..or just told me to f*ck off.

Its funny when it boils down to it tall people will and do admit that height discrimination is not all in the minds of men. Both your parents are well aware of the advantages innlife they have from being tall and the disadvantages you will face being shorter.

Im certain had a random stranger told them taller folk were better off they would have dismissed it and made out tall people have to work just as hard as shorter ones
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EndGame

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #28 on: October 16, 2016, 02:22:59 PM »

I'm no doctor so I don't know. I think it has its pros and cons.

You are correct. I've been planning on doing both one segment at a time and it's unquestionably the best way to go for me. If you are looking for 10 cm or less total doing both together might be best choice depending on other factors. Definitely pros and cons. LL is not one size fits all...
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EndGame

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #29 on: October 16, 2016, 02:38:06 PM »

Hello guys,

Thank you for replying to my post. I am 24 (170cm - 172cm) and I plan on doing 5.5 cm Latn tibia. I plan to stay close to the doctor until consolidation is mostly complete. For LATN, this is about 1.5 months/cm and that is why I will be abroad for 8 months.

The reason I am considering telling my parents is in the case of complications. Plus I figure they will know when I return home. A lot of people on this forum seem to be seeking this surgery. So my question is have you told your parents about this procedure, how did you tell your parents? What was there reaction etc.

Thank you,

TrueSpartan

I told my immediate family. They didn't understand, but were very supportive. I brought it up circuitously by talking about dating and dating sites. They don't make women list their measurements and weight but men do get bombarded with 5'10-6'8" height desired in women's profiles constantly even if the woman is short most of the time. Pull up match profiles at random with them and explain how you know height should not matter but you feel you'll be happier dating and in life with the scales tilted in your favor rather than against you. Also, point out that our language itself in inherently heightist. I look up to him, he's so smart. Head and shoulders above the rest, he's such a great lawyer or whatever. Our language uses expressions of someone being tall to describe them being good at all sorts of things. Average income differences can be pointed out. Tallest presidential candidate wins like over 90% of the time. However, what helped me the most was saying I'm going the the best doctor, the doctor who fixes the mistakes made by other quacks out there. If you plan on going overseas to a third world country it probably will be a much harder sell to your parents. Good luck.
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TnaTna

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Re: Telling parents
« Reply #30 on: October 16, 2016, 04:22:09 PM »

They don't make women list their measurements and weight but men do get bombarded with 5'10-6'8" height desired in women's profiles constantly even if the woman is short most of the time.

Aren't you exaggerating ? I think it is quite uncommon a girl asks for more than 6'1", and I never heard about a girl asking for more than 6'3".
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