It's possible to stop thinking about height. I've thought about height ever since I'd been discriminated against in school for my height. Always being picked last in basketball. Always being rejected by girls for my height. Always being the butt of people's short jokes. That stuff bothered me when I was younger, because I had the impression that looks and acceptance from your peers were the most important part of a person. After my teens were over, I realized that there's more to life than just looks. My height stopped being important as I started developing a better personality, and making more money. Girls were attracted to me despite me being short.
About four years ago, I researched LL out of curiosity. On the surface, it looked like something cool to do. I had braces before to fix my crooked teeth, so I figured that this would be similar to that. After reading several diaries, especially oldiebutgoldie's, I decided not to do it. It seemed like a lot of pain and suffering with so-so results at the end. The next two years after that event, I stopped thinking about my height. Everything was great. I wish my story ended there, and I lived happily ever after. I wish the same would happen to some of you.
About a year ago, I got back to the whole height thing again. And that's when I knew that this was going to be an ongoing problem. There was no trigger for it. My main issue was that I'm sort of a perfectionist and overachiever. And everything in my life was excellent, except for my height. It was the blemish that stood out like a black dot on a white piece of paper. So while I was able to put it in the back of my mind, eventually on a boring day, it would come back to haunt me.
And that's when I got the surgery to get this "blemish" removed permanently. And after the surgery, it's finally gone. I didn't get my "goal" height of 5'10"-5'11". But that's okay. 5'8"-5'9" is fine for me. I have the option to do tibias, but after going through the surgery, I realized that it was not worth it. I instead learned to accept myself, even though I'm still technically short if being short meant below average.
The way I got over my "perfectionist/overachiever" curse was that while I was sitting here in pain from my surgery I finally took a step back to look at what I achieved. And it was much greater than 99.9% of what most people spend their entire lives trying to do. That's why I said enough was enough. I'm physically abusing myself to try to "better" myself? F that.
That's when I cured my height neurosis. I think you get a wake up call when you're writhing in level 10 pain and hitting rock bottom. That's when you appreciate having a pain-free life much more. And also a greater appreciation for working legs.
Author
Topic: do you think you will ever stop thinking about height (Read 13261 times)