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Author Topic: How to quell the height Disphoria?  (Read 2047 times)

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TIBIKE200

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How to quell the height Disphoria?
« on: January 30, 2016, 03:46:54 PM »

As the title might suggest I am asking people here what they did in order to lower the magnitude of their height neurosis. In the past two weeks my height neurosis got to a degree that basically doesn't let me to function like before (Studies and social life).
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PatientZero

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2016, 03:51:37 PM »

Focus on your career for a few years. Join a startup or fast-growth company that will give you so much work you will have no time to breathe or think about anything but work.

The dudes here with a real job are considerably more confident than those who don't. I don't see any self-made millionaires, lawyers or traders feeling sorry for themselves, their attitude is different because they possess the will and means to change their own lives.
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TIBIKE200

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2016, 03:59:49 PM »

Focus on your career for a few years. Join a startup or fast-growth company that will give you so much work you will have no time to breathe or think about anything but work.

The dudes here with a real job are considerably more confident than those who don't. I don't see any self-made millionaires, lawyers or traders feeling sorry for themselves, their attitude is different because they possess the will and means to change their own lives.

I am studying medicine. I think it takes alot of my time
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Alu

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2016, 08:09:25 PM »

How did your HD even begin? You seem to have just developed it suddenly as you are 25 years old and stopped growing ages ago...

Either way this is broad advice for everyone here:

Realize, and this is completely a case by case basis, that you might not have as bad as others. Whether it's that others are shorter then you or that other medical, financial, family related burdens don't effect you. Be thankful for that.

Second, also realize that people don't really give a damn about you or your problems. What I mean is that as humans we all find our happiness through sheer ignorance. It's natural and healthy that we are ignorant (...well to some extent and to some problems...). As a result, don't think that people who are inherently taller then you are judging you because you are shorter then them. At the same time they are not better then you: unless they are multi-millionaires :P. To this end, get thicker skin, you won't be able to function in life even if you become average or close to it since you let comments push you to breaking a bone. Who knows what your next insecurity might be...

When it comes to dating stop the generalization. It's all so subjective and so varied. Women don't run on instinct, (men do more actually heuheuheu). It sucks that there are girls who, even after LL, would still be 2-3 inches taller then you, but hey that's life bro. There are many beautiful, non-shallow girls, of all types of heights.

Other people are your height (more so if you are closer to average or average) and they seem to be function just well in society; ask yourself why can't you? This leads me to my final point.

Do get some specialized help. I can understand if the notion of therapy seems embarrassing to some of you, but it's a much better alternative then simply jumping into a decision to break your legs (with a surgery that isn't a guaranteed success even with Paley or Guichet as I know they've had their problems). I never understood why some of you guys seem so open against it. Sure for those who are objectionably short (not those who are 2-3 inches below average), you might feel that won't do much, but at least it will get you out of the mindset that height is everything that has/will ever hold you back.

I still believe intelligence and wealth are the superior traits in this world.
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TIBIKE200

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2016, 08:16:44 PM »

How did your HD even begin? You seem to have just developed it suddenly as you are 25 years old and stopped growing ages ago...

Either way this is broad advice for everyone here:

Realize, and this is completely a case by case basis, that you might not have as bad as others. Whether it's that others are shorter then you or that other medical, financial, family related burdens don't effect you. Be thankful for that.

Second, also realize that people don't really give a damn about you or your problems. What I mean is that as humans we all find our happiness through sheer ignorance. It's natural and healthy that we are ignorant (...well to some extent and to some problems...). As a result, don't think that people who are inherently taller then you are judging you because you are shorter then them. At the same time they are not better then you: unless they are multi-millionaires :P. To this end, get thicker skin, you won't be able to function in life even if you become average or close to it since you let comments push you to breaking a bone. Who knows what your next insecurity might be...

When it comes to dating stop the generalization. It's all so subjective and so varied. Women don't run on instinct, (men do more actually heuheuheu). It sucks that there are girls who, even after LL, would still be 2-3 inches taller then you, but hey that's life bro. There are many beautiful, non-shallow girls, of all types of heights.

Other people are your height (more so if you are closer to average or average) and they seem to be function just well in society; ask yourself why can't you? This leads me to my final point.

Do get some specialized help. I can understand if the notion of therapy seems embarrassing to some of you, but it's a much better alternative then simply jumping into a decision to break your legs (with a surgery that isn't a guaranteed success even with Paley or Guichet as I know they've had their problems). I never understood why some of you guys seem so open against it. Sure for those who are objectionably short (not those who are 2-3 inches below average), you might feel that won't do much, but at least it will get you out of the mindset that height is everything that has/will ever hold you back.

I still believe intelligence and wealth are the superior traits in this world.

My HD began when I studied for endocrinology exam 2 years ago. There was a huge focus on growth problems etc.. Up until than I wasnt aware to my height (Since again, I am not short just 2-3inches below average) because no one ever said to me that I am short or anything else that's related to height. It's more of an inner problem than a problem I hve with society.
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Alu

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #5 on: January 30, 2016, 08:33:25 PM »

I can completely relate to that. I was in that mindset couple months back. But I realized after a few days that I was completely normal; that and the fact that since my dad is a doctor he would periodically check on my health/blood. I have a record of everything and pretty much turned out I was developing just like everyone else; just programmed to be shorter is all.

Based on the information you pointed out on the "How tall are you parents.." thread I'd say you didn't have any growing problems. You certainly couldn't have had precocious puberty. There's no real rule saying that one has to become taller then their fathers, even if that seems like the norm.

Just look at Michael Jordan's sons: MJ is 6'6, his sons are 6'0 and 6'4. George Bush Sr is 6'2, H Bush is 6'0, and Jeb is 6'3. At the same time, the best example in this case would be Bill Gates, who has a father that is 2 meters tall while he's only 5'10. Guess what, considering he went to Harvard, starter Microsoft and become a billionaire he couldn't have had any growing problems since his brain clearly developed fully (IE: he's a smart healthy man).

So to that end, don't beat yourself to much over it. But do take everything I said into consideration. Even with LL you could end up feeling sad if you continue with the mindset that you didn't develop fully; which might not be true. Be happy you are your dad's height though..
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TIBIKE200

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #6 on: January 30, 2016, 09:16:29 PM »

I can completely relate to that. I was in that mindset couple months back. But I realized after a few days that I was completely normal; that and the fact that since my dad is a doctor he would periodically check on my health/blood. I have a record of everything and pretty much turned out I was developing just like everyone else; just programmed to be shorter is all.

Based on the information you pointed out on the "How tall are you parents.." thread I'd say you didn't have any growing problems. You certainly couldn't have had precocious puberty. There's no real rule saying that one has to become taller then their fathers, even if that seems like the norm.

Just look at Michael Jordan's sons: MJ is 6'6, his sons are 6'0 and 6'4. George Bush Sr is 6'2, H Bush is 6'0, and Jeb is 6'3. At the same time, the best example in this case would be Bill Gates, who has a father that is 2 meters tall while he's only 5'10. Guess what, considering he went to Harvard, starter Microsoft and become a billionaire he couldn't have had any growing problems since his brain clearly developed fully (IE: he's a smart healthy man).

So to that end, don't beat yourself to much over it. But do take everything I said into consideration. Even with LL you could end up feeling sad if you continue with the mindset that you didn't develop fully; which might not be true. Be happy you are your dad's height though..

I never thought I had some kind of a genetic defect. Altough I did have a late onset puberty.
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Deads

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #7 on: January 30, 2016, 10:22:53 PM »

I never thought I had some kind of a genetic defect. Altough I did have a late onset puberty.

First thing is to get off of this forum because it only focuses on your HD more.. Also, get out a ruler. You said you want to gain like 5cm right?.... Are you really going to let 5cm, that tiny little distance between you and average height (from memory you're only 4.3cm off of average height because you're 171 right?) make you feel like you aren't good enough? And don't try to tell me that you don't feel like your height isn't good enough.

It's nothing, but you're slowly letting yourself believe it's a much bigger thing than it actually is.
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TIBIKE200

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Re: How to quell the height Disphoria?
« Reply #8 on: January 30, 2016, 10:30:24 PM »

First thing is to get off of this forum because it only focuses on your HD more.. Also, get out a ruler. You said you want to gain like 5cm right?.... Are you really going to let 5cm, that tiny little distance between you and average height (from memory you're only 4.3cm off of average height because you're 171 right?) make you feel like you aren't good enough? And don't try to tell me it's not that you feel like your height isn't good enough.

It's nothing, but you're slowly letting yourself believe it's a much bigger thing than it actually is.

Yeah I am 171 (172 now thx to yoga.. I checked it again today). Yeah... This forum doesnt help
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