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[DoingItForMe]

a year, two and three. its will diminish your athletic ability, maybe later you can play it for fun, but make a career from it no way. the theory say the new bone should be same or stronger but i don't know why people strugle

They struggle not because of the bone. The bone will be thicker in that area after LL. The problem is that your muscles are stretched out. When it's stretched out, it's weaker. Also add the fact that you won't use your muscles for a few months. That makes you much weaker, too. Sometimes people never recover from muscle atrophy. My legs are definitely much weaker than before. I struggle just to get up from a squat. The rest of my body is as strong or stronger than before, though. Just the thigh/butt area is weak as hell. I might recover because I'm not competitive. But if someone were in competitive sports... you can forget about it.

If you go with 6 cm instead of 8 cm, you can probably start walking in 4-6 months. That's a very realistic goal. Will you be normal in 4-6 months? No. Your walking will look weird still. And your butt will be non-existent. And your muscles will be so weak that you can't even get up from a squat.

[The Kaiser]

They struggle not because of the bone. The bone will be thicker in that area after LL. The problem is that your muscles are stretched out. When it's stretched out, it's weaker. Also add the fact that you won't use your muscles for a few months. That makes you much weaker, too. Sometimes people never recover from muscle atrophy. My legs are definitely much weaker than before. I struggle just to get up from a squat. The rest of my body is as strong or stronger than before, though. Just the thigh/butt area is weak as hell. I might recover because I'm not competitive. But if someone were in competitive sports... you can forget about it.

If you go with 6 cm instead of 8 cm, you can probably start walking in 4-6 months. That's a very realistic goal. Will you be normal in 4-6 months? No. Your walking will look weird still. And your butt will be non-existent. And your muscles will be so weak that you can't even get up from a squat.

There are a lot walked normally in 6 months, especially with Guichet

[drvbmc]

My challenge is trying to understand what is a single person's experience vs what is the likely outcome.

I find it disappointing that Paley significantly understates the extent of this procedure, and is apparently telling people that the chance of 100% recover is nearly 100% (from what I have read). I am certainly getting a different picture from many others.

In my mind, if there is even a 15-20% chance of permanent reduction in ability, I do not think this procedure is worth the risk. I would rather live pain free with full function than a couple inches taller and in constant pain.

[The Kaiser]

My challenge is trying to understand what is a single person's experience vs what is the likely outcome.

I find it disappointing that Paley significantly understates the extent of this procedure, and is apparently telling people that the chance of 100% recover is nearly 100% (from what I have read). I am certainly getting a different picture from many others.

In my mind, if there is even a 15-20% chance of permanent reduction in ability, I do not think this procedure is worth the risk. I would rather live pain free with full function than a couple inches taller and in constant pain.

your strength will reduce for sure, you will be 80-90% fully recoverd at best

[TIBIKE200]

My challenge is trying to understand what is a single person's experience vs what is the likely outcome.

I find it disappointing that Paley significantly understates the extent of this procedure, and is apparently telling people that the chance of 100% recover is nearly 100% (from what I have read). I am certainly getting a different picture from many others.

In my mind, if there is even a 15-20% chance of permanent reduction in ability, I do not think this procedure is worth the risk. I would rather live pain free with full function than a couple inches taller and in constant pain.

 If that's the case, this surgery isnt for you. If you arent willing to sacrifice your athletisism to an extent, you have nothing to search with this kind of surgery as your athletic ability will be diminished afterwards

[EliminateError]

In my mind, if there is even a 15-20% chance of permanent reduction in ability, I do not think this procedure is worth the risk. I would rather live pain free with full function than a couple inches taller and in constant pain.

You are right reduction in 20% ability coupled with pain for life might not be worth it. However, the way I look at it is if you grow taller and you become bigger than your former self, then the reduced ability could be explained by the fact that bigger guys are less agile than smaller guys. Also in boxing smaller guys have quicker reflexes and move faster than bigger guys. Thats just my take on it without any scientific thought behind it. Obviously people who have done the surgery are more well equipped to answer this.

However, I would be very interested in knowing about people who have only done 4-5cm max with internal femurs and their athletic ability and pain levels say 5 years after the operation.

[The Kaiser]

You are right reduction in 20% ability coupled with pain for life might not be worth it. However, the way I look at it is if you grow taller and you become bigger than your former self, then the reduced ability could be explained by the fact that bigger guys are less agile than smaller guys. Also in boxing smaller guys have quicker reflexes and move faster than bigger guys. Thats just my take on it without any scientific thought behind it. Obviously people who have done the surgery are more well equipped to answer this.

However, I would be very interested in knowing about people who have only done 4-5cm max with internal femurs and their athletic ability and pain levels say 5 years after the operation.

when you become taller by operation, you will not get bigger, your gene remain same. accept the lose of athletic ability and do it, or continue your career if you have one. sometimes its will be sad, imagine someone stole your wallet and you walk normally and slow to catch him

[YourSpaceBoyfriend]

You are right reduction in 20% ability coupled with pain for life might not be worth it. However, the way I look at it is if you grow taller and you become bigger than your former self, then the reduced ability could be explained by the fact that bigger guys are less agile than smaller guys. Also in boxing smaller guys have quicker reflexes and move faster than bigger guys. Thats just my take on it without any scientific thought behind it. Obviously people who have done the surgery are more well equipped to answer this.

However, I would be very interested in knowing about people who have only done 4-5cm max with internal femurs and their athletic ability and pain levels say 5 years after the operation.

You lose athletic abilities because you stretch your soft tissue(muscles etc.)

[EliminateError]

when you become taller by operation, you will not get bigger, your gene remain same. accept the lose of athletic ability and do it, or continue your career if you have one. sometimes its will be sad, imagine someone stole your wallet and you walk normally and slow to catch him

Thanks for your response. I do have a career which requires me to sit all day long. I just thought if I achieve my goal of 4cm internal femurs it won't compromise my athletic abilities that much. But I havent seen enough cases who did 4cm on this website, I guess it might not be worth it for many llers.

You lose athletic abilities because you stretch your soft tissue(muscles etc.) [/quote]

If you stretch soft tissues etc then even 1cm will have an affect on athletic ability for sure.

[drvbmc]

In the end, we can all agree that there is risk associated with this procedure.

The one problem I think people make is desiring longer lengths than their bodies can handle. I can certainly see why people would 'stretch' for more, but therein lies the risk/reward.

The question I would like to explore is:

What is the # of cm an average healthy male can lengthen his femurs and then achieve 80-90% mobility AND be pain free within 2 years after the procedure.

I realize this is not admissible medical evidence, but opinions are all we have at this point, since we can not always trust the surgeons opinion.

Post a number from 0-10 cm. 

My initial thought leans to 4 cm.

ps. Do not take into account - 'is it worth it?'
I am only exploring what we think the body can handle.

[TIBIKE200]

In the end, we can all agree that there is risk associated with this procedure.

The one problem I think people make is desiring longer lengths than their bodies can handle. I can certainly see why people would 'stretch' for more, but therein lies the risk/reward.

The question I would like to explore is:

What is the # of cm an average healthy male can lengthen his femurs and then achieve 80-90% mobility AND be pain free within 2 years after the procedure.

I realize this is not admissible medical evidence, but opinions are all we have at this point, since we can not always trust the surgeons opinion.

Post a number from 0-10 cm. 

My initial thought leans to 4 cm.

ps. Do not take into account - 'is it worth it?'
I am only exploring what we think the body can handle.

 Maybe open another thread about this? It's DIFM diary...

[drvbmc]

Sorry. No disrespect intended.

Will start a separate post.

[Peaceout]

Hey man,how are you?How is life with your new height ?

[DoingItForMe]

Hey man,how are you?How is life with your new height ?

I've been enjoying life, man. I realize why a lot of LL veterans don't return here after they're done with the LL. They don't want to be reminded of their surgery and the torment they went through. They've moved on with their lives.

I am one of those people now. I don't think about my height anymore. I used to think that I'd be better off if I were just a little bit taller at 5'10" or 5'11". But nowadays I simply don't care. Why? Because I'm too busy enjoying my life.

I remember that I kept getting asked this question a lot: Do you have regrets about the surgery or was the surgery worth it or if you could turn back time would you do it again? My answer was always wavering, because it depended on whether I had any permanent issues such as weird walking or permanent pain/tightness. I feel that I am ready to give an answer now.

Let me start by giving an update on my life since my last update. According to my latest x-ray, my bones still haven't healed fully yet. Bad news. The gap between the two pieces of my femur show little to no signs of growth. Of the little growth I see, I estimate that it'd take maybe 3 or more years before the gap closes. The good news is that the pain has subsided enough that I don't remember that I had LL - when before it used to hurt just by even sitting still. Now I only feel the pain once in a while when I angle my legs in a weird way or if I take a heavy side step or trip. But a majority of the time, my legs just feel normal again.

The other thing that happened, if you followed my diary, was my long-term gf broke up with me after I did the surgery. I always suspected that it was because I had the surgery. Well, a few weeks ago, I finally met up with her again, and she confirmed me that yes, the surgery was one of the major reasons why she broke up with me. She liked me when I was shorter and actually doesn't like my new height. She says I look disproportional. She says that I walk funny still. It's weird that she said that because I thought I was walking normally now. But after I watched a recorded video of myself, I can confirm that even today, I still walk funny. I can't even consciously correct it, because in my mind, I am walking normally. But when I watch the video, I can see that it looks weird. I concluded that it's because my femur-to-tibia ratio is screwed up, so the movement of my legs looks weird now. I looks like I'm dragging the lower part of my legs now, as if they were extra heavy.

After she said all that, I wanted to come on this forum and say that I regret doing the surgery. This was a girl who I planned to live the rest of my life with, and this surgery tore us apart. And now that I look deformed, I wondered if any girl would want to date me.

But then I realized that I was doing it again. I was trading one neurosis with another. I could have focused on how weird I walked and how disproportionate my legs look now. And I had every reason to because a girl who used to love me is rejecting me now for those things. But I didn't.

I just stopped caring. I'm not going to spend the time and energy focusing on these superficial things about myself anymore. I instead am focusing on doing the things I love doing, and I'm living a pretty happy life right now. And I would have been happy even without the surgery. I know because I remember that I felt this way a few years ago when I was still short. And I hope that you guys can reach that point, too. And if you think you can only reach that point if you had a girlfriend, and if you think you can only get a girlfriend if you're taller, then you're wrong. I am single now and have been ever since the surgery. It's strange because when I was short, I was almost never single. I always had a fear of being alone and not being wanted when I was short. But now that I'm taller, I don't have those insecurities anymore. And without those insecurities, I realized that I don't even need a gf anymore to be happy. And I'm not even saying it like I'm in some kind of denial. I've just reached that point in my life where I truly don't care what people think of me, and that I'm going to live the life that I always dreamed of living. I don't need validation from anyone.

So no, I don't regret the surgery. But at the same time, I don't think the surgery was necessary to be happy with myself. Some people think that their life will be happy if only they got this surgery and if only they were taller. But they're wrong to think that way. Don't delay your happiness. Because, let me tell you, once you get taller, there's going to be something else in your life that you don't like about yourself. It's just going to keep on going and going. You'll never be satisfied, until you start focusing on the positives in your life. You'll be happier for it if you do.

[crimsontide]

I doubt you look deformed.   It will take a while to  get your gait  back to normal.  3 years is a very long time to have union. I think if you wanna get back to normal  faster,  there are braces  that will greatly help. I think I'm around  70% now, and there's this advanced brace that will likely make me  90 to 95% again, maybe even run. The brace  is very form fitting as well, so will not be noticeable under your jeans/pants. It's ridiculous that we have to  get devices to make our  walking as before, but we have to do what we  have to do.

[DoingItForMe]

I doubt you look deformed.   It will take a while to  get your gait  back to normal.  3 years is a very long time to have union. I think if you wanna get back to normal  faster,  there are braces  that will greatly help. I think I'm around  70% now, and there's this advanced brace that will likely make me  90 to 95% again, maybe even run. The brace  is very form fitting as well, so will not be noticeable under your jeans/pants. It's ridiculous that we have to  get devices to make our  walking as before, but we have to do what we  have to do.

No, I do looked deformed. When I looked at the video of myself, it looks very odd that my knees are bending well below where it should be bending on a normally proportioned leg. And my gait doesn't look like it has improved at all in the past year.

I don't need the brace, because I don't care if my gait looks weird. It's a part of who I am now, and I'm tired of conforming to what society has led me to believe is "ideal" or "normal". I don't care anymore if I'm not what people expect or hoped for. This year is the year that I finally accepted myself for who I am, and now I don't want to change a thing. If I get my normal gait back or not is irrelevant to me right now. I've let go of trying to be "perfect". I wanted to start living my life as if I were already perfect and happy. And that's exactly what I started doing. And that's why you haven't heard from me in a while. I'm no longer thinking things like, "I'll be happy when this or that happens to me or when I become this or that." No. No more "I'll be happy when..." I'm just happy. End of story.

[TIBIKE200]

So in the end you regret for doing it? You think you could have reach your happines without the surgery?

[Penguinn]

Are you sure you're/she's not amplifying the disproportion? As someone who did 3" on femurs at a lower starting height than you, it's honestly not that bad. Only time I notice the long femurs is when I'm sitting and leaning back instead of sitting up straight. I haven't begun to walk unaided yet but I'm sure wearing shoes will improve the femur:tibia ratio too.

Anyway, I'm glad you're at peace, man. Enjoy your life.

[DoingItForMe]

So in the end you regret for doing it? You think you could have reach your happines without the surgery?

No, I don't regret it, because I don't know if I could have come to this realization if I didn't do the surgery. I might forever be stuck in that "what if I were taller?" mindset and be forever curious. But now that I filled that curiosity and did it, I can say conclusively that the surgery wasn't necessary.

It's not that I think I could reach my happiness without the surgery. I know I could. I actually had that happiness prior to the surgery, and I even spoke about it in my diary before. I knew about this surgery like 5 years ago or so. After many months of considering it, I concluded that the surgery was stupid, and ignored it for a few years. I put all that height stuff behind me. And for a good 2-3 years, I didn't think about my height, and I was happy with what I had - cute and loving gf, good job, nice house, and etc. But it was because I was such a damn perfectionist that I wanted more. And that's when I came back to these forums and other "short height" forums and read about how being short is bad and how heightism is rampant. And that's when I convinced myself that maybe I'm flawed too and I should fix it. But I wish I could go back in time and hug my younger self and tell him that he's good just the way he is even if he doesn't fit the mold of the "ideal" male body. And that's why I'm actually back here talking to you guys. It's that I wish I could give you guys a hug and tell you to not do the surgery.

The thing is that my gf at the time actually did do that. And I ignored her. I let other short guys get to me and destroy my self-esteem by hearing their stories of rejections and disadvantages and lack of respect. Don't listen to that crap. Listen to the under-5'6" doingitforme who was happy and had it all prior to the surgery. You can be like him. Yes, heightism is real, and it's something that won't go away. But that doesn't mean that you have to be angered by it. You are letting the heightists win if you let them get under your skin. And they especially win if you end up paying $100,000 and 6 months of your life to "fix" your height. For what? Just to please some dckheads who were rude and made fun of your height? Just so that heightist/superficial girl would date you? Screw that.

Of course, you probably won't listen, though. After all, this is a LL forum. But, another LL veteran (oldiebutgoldie) convinced me 4 years ago to forget the surgery, and I did. I just wish 2 years ago I had the conviction to stay convinced and not let those heightists get under my skin again. The only problem then was that I became the heightist. I had convinced myself that being short is bad and that 5'10" is the ideal "most attractive" height. I screwed up. I became my own bully. Don't become like me. Get away from this forum and run far far away. Stop reading articles about heightism. Stop listening to sob stories from other short men. Instead, listen to the short men who are happy with their lives. Don't feed that demon that is telling you that people don't like you because you're short. Don't become your own bully. Be happy with your life. You can do it without this surgery. Good luck.

[Alu]

I greatly appreciate the honesty man. Really do. On top of that I do find myself happiest when I'm far away from the forums at that. ("Heightism" just doesn't really affect me).

So I have to ask 2 questions now after all of this.

One is kinda for old times sake (if you know me well that is). But, in light of who it came from, if you feel it's in bad taste feel free to ignore: that comment about disproportionation, was that just about femur to tibia, or also applies to leg to torso? Would it have been noticeable if it the increase was perfectly balanced on both segments?

Lastly, what now man? What's your plan and when should we expect another update? From what I can tell you definitely want to start moving on.

[willsa]

Thank you very much for your honest feedback. I can imagine how hard it was to write some of that, but it is seriously appreciated.

I have faith that you will improve your gait as time goes on. I'm sure it isn't nearly as bad as you think, we all tend to overemphasize our own insecurities.

[CaptainAmerica]

Don't sweat the girl man. I feel like you've let her get in your head, and you're clinging to the best memories of her. If one of the major reasons she broke up with you was LL, she was going to break up with you anyway. She should've supported you the whole way, because it's what you needed to be "happy."

Honestly, she sounds pretty selfish and like an absolute ***** for her to tell you you now look disproportionate. This is going to sound kind of, rude, but honestly I feel like she probably thought she had you locked down as a 5'5 rich dude's best option.

It sounds to me like you were happier before surgery though, because you felt like you had "everything" or whatever. Alright bro, but what happens when that girl eventually breaks up with you (or divorces you) and you're still 5'5 and it takes months for you to get a rebound girl. It's impossible to get a one night stand at 5'5, and it could take months to secure a girlfriend. Having to play the happy dance, prove yourself, etc.. Meanwhile a 5'9-5'10 dude can go on Tinder and make a profile like a regular fking person and get a few matches. (But it may be different for you cause you're rich).

You'll find your happiness again. You'll get a new girl. One that's significantly taller than her, so your kids won't eventually have to go through this BS too (that's if you plan on having kids lol).

If you really want your bones to heal, this may be a stupid suggestion (as I'm sure you're doing this), but start taking Vitamin K2, lots of Calcium, HGH, etc...

I know a girl who was temporarily paralyzed playing soccer when she was 12 and she walked really funny for like all of middle school, but then sophomore year of high school I couldn't even recognize her because she was walking normally. I know you can improve your gait.

[CaptainAmerica]

Also, what happens if you lose the money, and the house? What if the money stops coming in (or a lot less of it starts coming in). This is what happened to my dad. He was 5'5. He was a nice bald man, but my mom just said she never found him attractive in *that* way and only married him cause he was young. As soon as the 2008 financial crisis hit, and the money started slowing down, she left him, and she's had no problem dating plenty of much younger, taller attractive dudes. But my dad? He's been single and lonely this whole time. He's never really recovered financially, or emotionally, and whenever he gets drunk he still talks about her.

I think you've seriously forgotten what a disadvantage you have at life at 5'5. The odd stares when you walk into a nice restaurant, the weird treatment at the airport, the fact that with any given girl you want to approach or get with, you have like a 10% chance of her not dismissing you entirely cause of your height. And even then, not having to make up for your lack of height with being rich, or really anything else. Now girls can just just like you for you.

Don't forget all that man. You're free from all that now. You can live a "normal" life.

[Alu]

Don't sweat the girl man. I feel like you've let her get in your head, and you're clinging to the best memories of her. If one of the major reasons she broke up with you was LL, she was going to break up with you anyway. She should've supported you the whole way, because it's what you needed to be "happy."

Honestly, she sounds pretty selfish and like an absolute ***** for her to tell you you now look disproportionate. This is going to sound kind of, rude, but honestly I feel like she probably thought she had you locked down as a 5'5 rich dude's best option.

It sounds to me like you were happier before surgery though, because you felt like you had "everything" or whatever. Alright bro, but what happens when that girl eventually breaks up with you (or divorces you) and you're still 5'5 and it takes months for you to get a rebound girl. It's impossible to get a one night stand at 5'5, and it could take months to secure a girlfriend. Having to play the happy dance, prove yourself, etc.. Meanwhile a 5'9-5'10 dude can go on Tinder and make a profile like a regular fking person and get a few matches. (But it may be different for you cause you're rich).

You'll find your happiness again. You'll get a new girl. One that's significantly taller than her, so your kids won't eventually have to go through this BS too (that's if you plan on having kids lol).

You really really really really missed the point didn't you...

[CaptainAmerica]

You really really really really missed the point didn't you...

No. The dude just came into LL with bad timing and a non-supportive girl. That's why he feels this weird way now. He says he's okay being single but obviously that's not true, he's trying to cope into this weird "strong" personality that he doesn't care about anything and he's just going to be happy. But obviously he still misses that girl a lot and regrets the surgery because he thinks it's what made him lose her. And the fact that he hasn't dated since having the surgery only multiplies this feeling tenfold.

He could've just as easily gotten LL, met the love of his life (taller than 5'5), and also randomly made ten billion more dollars and he'd be in a much happier place now. He'd be signing autographs, going on TV, recommending LL to the whole wide world, every man, woman, and child. But I truly feel like losing his girl along the way really, really messed with him.

Just so that heightist/superficial girl would date you? Screw that.

Just LOL. Dude, why are you still trying to be so nice? I can tell you're an awkward, nice guy by the way you write. You've made your goals. You are accomplished. It's time to go on savage time.

[IwannaBeTaller]

I just stopped caring. I'm not going to spend the time and energy focusing on these superficial things about myself anymore. I instead am focusing on doing the things I love doing, and I'm living a pretty happy life right now. And I would have been happy even without the surgery. I know because I remember that I felt this way a few years ago when I was still short. And I hope that you guys can reach that point, too. And if you think you can only reach that point if you had a girlfriend, and if you think you can only get a girlfriend if you're taller, then you're wrong. I am single now and have been ever since the surgery. It's strange because when I was short, I was almost never single. I always had a fear of being alone and not being wanted when I was short. But now that I'm taller, I don't have those insecurities anymore. And without those insecurities, I realized that I don't even need a gf anymore to be happy. And I'm not even saying it like I'm in some kind of denial. I've just reached that point in my life where I truly don't care what people think of me, and that I'm going to live the life that I always dreamed of living. I don't need validation from anyone.

That's a very wise realization to have, especially if someone doesn't only say it but actually believes it (which I truly believe you do). And if you've come to that realization only after the surgery, so be it. Life has its strange ways.

However, I'm still very doubtful I can be completely happy without getting taller. No matter how often I think that so many short men succeed in life and absolutely "own their height", I don't want to have the same fate. It's just that my dad is about 6 cm taller and I have this incredibly tenacious suspicion that I might have stunted my growth during my teen years, and thus never reached his height. The complications from this surgery - pain, muscle weakness, irritations -they are annoying and they suck. But height, that is something very different. It is something that through an abstract societal mechanism defines your very worth and status as a male human being. Something that is in some way intrinsically bound to you as a person. Pain and discomfort are not. That's why I sometimes think that no matter what I will need this surgery.

All the best to you.

[CaptainAmerica]

That's a very wise realization to have, especially if someone doesn't only say it but actually believes it (which I truly believe you do). And if you've come to that realization only after the surgery, so be it. Life has its strange ways.

However, I'm still very doubtful I can be completely happy without getting taller. No matter how often I think that so many short men succeed in life and absolutely "own their height", I don't want to have the same fate. It's just that my dad is about 6 cm taller and I have this incredibly tenacious suspicion that I might have stunted my growth during my teen years, and thus never reached his height. The complications from this surgery - pain, muscle weakness, irritations -they are annoying and they suck. But height, that is something very different. It is something that through an abstract societal mechanism defines your very worth and status as a male human being. Something that is in some way intrinsically bound to you as a person. Pain and discomfort are not. That's why I sometimes think that no matter what I will need this surgery.

All the best to you.

This. We can all sit back, hit a bong, and talk about how nice we feel and say we don't need any validation. But eventually that high wears off. And the moment you step outside, all those nice feelings disappear again. The moment a girl who's showing some interest in you says, "sorry, you're just too short." all those nice copes disappear again. Humans are social creatures, the desire to feel validated and belong to a group ("being a man", "being a man desired by women") is primitively encoded into our DNA.

DIFM, I know you say you're okay being single or whatever, but please, I really, really suggest you start dating again. You need to get over your ex. You will always subconsciously have a link with LL being bad because you miss your ex, until you get over her, you will feel like you made the wrong choice.

[TIBIKE200]

I actually agree with captainamerica 100%.

[Bigpoppapump]

Athletic ability is like st because you lose rom in your ankles with tibia and with femurs hips and knees can become tight. The muscle stretching loss is likely only in extreme amounts.

It also varies depending on the athletic abilities you are talking about, competitive sports you won't be as good as you were at and possible stuff like running for endurance. Weight training provided you stay in the smaller lengths it will be minimal.

I'd hazard a guess regardless that 95% of the guys on here are not good athletes anyway and certainly not top level one at that. Provided you can stay fit and build a bit of muscle afterwards you are good to go.  Look around gyms and see how many people have good bodies, the folk doing cardio are either skinny or fat and making zero progress and the weights area is full of fat guys under the delusion they are all pure muscle

As for your girlfriend making that comment about your proportions and walking I'm certain that if she had met you after your operation she wouldn't notice a thing! It's just her mind playing tricks on her because she knows you did it. Get over her and forget her and don't put her up on a pedestal, trust me she's not as great as you think she is that's just stuff us guys think in our heads

[DoingItForMe]

This. We can all sit back, hit a bong, and talk about how nice we feel and say we don't need any validation. But eventually that high wears off. And the moment you step outside, all those nice feelings disappear again. The moment a girl who's showing some interest in you says, "sorry, you're just too short." all those nice copes disappear again. Humans are social creatures, the desire to feel validated and belong to a group ("being a man", "being a man desired by women") is primitively encoded into our DNA.

DIFM, I know you say you're okay being single or whatever, but please, I really, really suggest you start dating again. You need to get over your ex. You will always subconsciously have a link with LL being bad because you miss your ex, until you get over her, you will feel like you made the wrong choice.

I see the misunderstanding here. When I say I'm single, it doesn't mean that I'm lonely and no girl is dating me. It means that I'm seeing several girls at once, and I haven't entered an exclusive relationship to any of them yet. I'm still playing the field because being a 5'9" young millionaire means that I get a new date request every few hours. And yes, a few of them are taller than my previous height, so I'm pretty sure that they wouldn't have dated me at 5'6". I'm sorry if that statement feeds anyone's height neurosis and inner bully. This is why I didn't want to mention it in my previous posts, and just left it at "I'm single".

So, I am very much over my ex. We broke up 2 years ago! I only mentioned her because I was curious if she broke up with me because of the surgery, and she confirmed it recently. I was only telling that story as a cautionary tale that the surgery might backfire (weird gait/disproportions with tibs/femur), and not because I miss her or regret the surgery.

Of course, everyone needs a little validation every now and then. But I'm saying that I don't think I need my height to feel validated. I am validated for my many many other accomplishments. So I'm saying that this surgery wasn't necessary. Yes, it sucks to be rejected for your height. I've been there. We've all been there. But you gotta learn to take rejection and not let it affect you. Just remind yourself that everyone has a type that they like, and just because you're not HER type, doesn't mean that you're a bad date. So don't beat yourself up if you are short. Now that I've been on both sides, short and normal height, I can say definitively that my happiness level remains unchanged from pre-surgery to post-surgery.

It's interesting that you say that the "high" wears off, because that's exactly what happened with my height "high". It was amazing at first to be taller, but that slowly became the norm, and that "high" is gone. If I craved more validation for my looks, I'd do my tibs and become 5'11" and fix my proportions. But I don't. I'm happy with who I am, and all I'm saying is that I hope you guys get to that place, too. I will have a beer waiting for you when you get to the other side. Best of luck to all you still fighting your inner demons.

[6FeetSoon]

Now that I've been on both sides, short and normal height, I can say definitively that my happiness level remains unchanged from pre-surgery to post-surgery.

This... is EXACTLY what Rozbruch and his psychologist are looking for. They want you to be extremely motivated, driven and successful before doing this, and make sure you're not doing this for validation. Your other accomplishments should speak for themselves.

Thank you for saying this