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[Marazs]

It really is man. I am sick of must to do my very best for everything extra. Doing my best and still i can't satisfying myself. Because whatever i do it is for nothing. Even when i am reach my goal, its not make my happy because, the fact that i HAD to do my EXTRA best makes my so sad. I wouldnt suffering and fight for someting that i actually deserve in normal case. For what should not have been a case for me. For something that obviously should have been that way.. But everything what i had reached was a lot of hard work.

I am almost 25, since last 5 years there was no one  singel day that i didnt think about how my live would looking if i was at least 10 cm taller. All the things that i have missed... I can not get it out of my head. Despite what I have achieved in recent years, i remember no day that i was really happy. I fought to every adversity every insult, humiliation, rejections and i thought it does not effect me..

NEVER NEVER NEVER i had never complained about my height to my friends, familie or someone else, everybudy thinks that i am tottaly secure about myself. That is also because I did not give them a chance to think different.

I am sick of this  . Work hard while you know it would not make you happy.

I advise my young short brothers to not set high goals for themseleves, because, even you reach it, it does not make you happy in one way. I really mean this good, because I want to save you the suffering. Just live your live and do so much things as possible that makes you happy and makes you feel comfortable. Dont get angry, dont get sad dont get ffurious. Because whatever you do its doesnt not matter.

This live is wasted, it is worth nothing. I know you will say i have self-pity and that i have not self esteem, but it is noting of that all. I have accept it for what it is and what it should be. But today, i wanted one single time drop out the frustrtation and indignation in me.

If I offend someone with this, excuse me.

[TIBIKE200]

How tall are you that you think your life is wasted?

[Body Builder]

Yes, if LL wasn't available then I would think the same at you, not that my life was wasted but that I can't kive it as good as taller men can and this is the reality.
But thanks god LL exists and I did it very young (at my 22) so I stopped feeling that my life is wasted.
Now, I still feel that 6-7 cm more would make a huge difference to me but I still feel that I can't live happily and even many women won't like me much due to my height, there are many that think I am very good, something that almost no woman would say at my preLL height (1.68).

So why you feel your life is wasted and you haven't already done LL at your 25 years?
What are you waiting? Things will never be better without LL so stop moaning and do it.

All these of course are understandable if you are less than 1.70 because if you are more, yes it is ok to want to be taller but saying your life is wasted is stupid.

So do LL or accept living miserably without moaning.

[myloginacct]

Hey, man, no need to apologize. You seem to have a lot going on in your mind. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about it or just vent.

I think most of us understand the feeling you're describing here. Just remember that no one is perfect. For this one trait of yourself, height, there's even this extreme surgery that can help alleviate that psychological pain to some degree. There might be even better methods when we're older. It could be one, but it's not a hopeless matter.

I am almost 25, since last 5 years there was no one  singel day that i didnt think about how my live would looking if i was at least 10 cm taller. All the things that i have missed... I can not get it out of my head. Despite what I have achieved in recent years, i remember no day that i was really happy. I fought to every adversity every insult, humiliation, rejections and i thought it does not effect me..

I know what some of those thoughts are like. But you need to remember no one is dealt a perfect hand in life. It could always have been worse, and it can always become even worse. I know this doesn't cheer someone up. However, it's something you can tell yourself during the worst days.

I am guessing you are in the very short range: sub 160cm to 164cm.

What if your problem was not that you lacked 10cm, but that you realistically needed to be more intelligent to do what you really want to do in life? Or something similar to that. Currently, making ourselves significantly more intelligent is outside of the realm of possibility. There are too many things in life that limit us, and for many of those, there's not a lot, if anything, that we can do about them. There are areas of STEM that I would love to touch and really learn, but I am just not intelligent enough for them. There's nothing I can do about it --- not even any type of surgery. This is not to say bad realities are set in stone forever. However, we have to focus on the present. I don't know where I'm going with this, but I was just hoping that offering some perspective, in the way I see things, at least, could help in some way.

If you're not actually short, I think you just need some form of counseling or help to deal with those feelings of yours. It doesn't need to be a therapist. It could be just a close friend you've known for years.

But anyway, thanks for sharing the insight you came to develop through your own personal experiences. That's unique to you.

[Android]

Feels like something I'd read in /r/short. Bitter, dire, and hopeless.

But this is a cosmetic limb lengthening forum, a place where you discover that height can actually be changed. Many feel empowered to learn that such procedures exist.

Somehow you found us, and at your age I'd think you'd be more curious and hopeful; instead you're preaching that life isn't worth maximizing as a short person. Not to downplay your advice, but you're still quite young. It does suck to be short, but you shouldn't confuse that emotion with wisdom.

Hope you get out of this mood, Marazs. Now I wonder: what's next?

[Marazs]

Hey, man, no need to apologize. You seem to have a lot going on in your mind. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about it or just vent.

I think most of us understand the feeling you're describing here. Just remember that no one is perfect. For this one trait of yourself, height, there's even this extreme surgery that can help alleviate that psychological pain to some degree. There might be even better methods when we're older. It could be one, but it's not a hopeless matter.

I know what some of those thoughts are like. But you need to remember no one is dealt a perfect hand in life. It could always have been worse, and it can always become even worse. I know this doesn't cheer someone up. However, it's something you can tell yourself during the worst days.

I am guessing you are in the very short range: sub 160cm to 164cm.

What if your problem was not that you lacked 10cm, but that you realistically needed to be more intelligent to do what you really want to do in life? Or something similar to that. Currently, making ourselves significantly more intelligent is outside of the realm of possibility. There are too many things in life that limit us, and for many of those, there's not a lot, if anything, that we can do about them. There are areas of STEM that I would love to touch and really learn, but I am just not intelligent enough for them. There's nothing I can do about it --- not even any type of surgery. This is not to say bad realities are set in stone forever. However, we have to focus on the present. I don't know where I'm going with this, but I was just hoping that offering some perspective, in the way I see things, at least, could help in some way.

If you're not actually short, I think you just need some form of counseling or help to deal with those feelings of yours. It doesn't need to be a therapist. It could be just a close friend you've known for years.

But anyway, thanks for sharing the insight you came to develop through your own personal experiences. That's unique to you.

Thanks for your comment, i try to see things always like you describe, like worse things could happen to me. And when i see people like that i thank god that i am healty.
But, when being short is the biggest fault in your live and an obstruction to a happy live then it it feels not different than that people. You cant feel different believe me.

Its make me so sad its feel not naturally, it feels like i have an psychological disease because i think oll the time about me height. When i see people i try to compare my height with them. When  I see them from a distance i follow them to compare! If there was a way to escape this schameful behavior and thoughts then I would have done it.

I know how shameful that sounds i cringe of myself!

[Marazs]

Yes, if LL wasn't available then I would think the same at you, not that my life was wasted but that I can't kive it as good as taller men can and this is the reality.
But thanks god LL exists and I did it very young (at my 22) so I stopped feeling that my life is wasted.
Now, I still feel that 6-7 cm more would make a huge difference to me but I still feel that I can't live happily and even many women won't like me much due to my height, there are many that think I am very good, something that almost no woman would say at my preLL height (1.68).

So why you feel your life is wasted and you haven't already done LL at your 25 years?
What are you waiting? Things will never be better without LL so stop moaning and do it.

All these of course are understandable if you are less than 1.70 because if you are more, yes it is ok to want to be taller but saying your life is wasted is stupid.

So do LL or accept living miserably without moaning.

Unfortunately i cant do LL. I havent thath money and time richt now because of my school. And when i have that money and and thime then i become tooo old, then it is not worth it anymore.
I come from The Netherlands people here dont give a lot attention on height becouse everybody is tall, but when you suddenly come taller then they will make fun of you beause of your lack of confidence. So you have also act like you are totaly confident about your height because lack of confidance is worse of being short.

I am agree with you that below 1.70 is desparate. If there was a way i could add 4 cm so i can at leaste be 1.70 without LL that woud make me a lot more happy.

[Marazs]

Feels like something I'd read in /r/short. Bitter, dire, and hopeless.

But this is a cosmetic limb lengthening forum, a place where you discover that height can actually be changed. Many feel empowered to learn that such procedures exist.

Somehow you found us, and at your age I'd think you'd be more curious and hopeful; instead you're preaching that life isn't worth maximizing as a short person. Not to downplay your advice, but you're still quite young. It does suck to be short, but you shouldn't confuse that emotion with wisdom.

Hope you get out of this mood, Marazs. Now I wonder: what's next?

I come here also to discover ways to make me taller but unfortunately there is nothing that i can use for my situation. 

[LAGrowin]

I understand how you feel completely, at just under168 before LL myself, I would always compare my height with others, it's is something you constantly think about, but thinking that life is wasted is too much.  It sounds like you don't have a very positive mentality in general, and you really need to change that period. You are young.

You might not have any immediate control over the situation right at the moment, so your energy should concentrate on what you can do now. Finish school, work hard, save, save, save, and put yourself in a situation where you can do LL with a competent Doctor and in a safe environment.

I am 45 years old, and just went through LL myself.  I didn't see myself as being too old. I am now more mature, and financially stable.  Yes,  I would have loved to get LL earlier in life, but I couldn't do it for many reasons. I will enjoy the next 15 years of being the height I always wanted, and will make the most of it.

Be positive first, and sacrifice a little under your current circumstances.  Focus on your future after LL.

Wish you all the best!

[myloginacct]

Unfortunately i cant do LL. I havent thath money and time richt now because of my school. And when i have that money and and thime then i become tooo old, then it is not worth it anymore.
I come from The Netherlands people here dont give a lot attention on height becouse everybody is tall, but when you suddenly come taller then they will make fun of you beause of your lack of confidence. So you have also act like you are totaly confident about your height because lack of confidance is worse of being short.

I am agree with you that below 1.70 is desparate. If there was a way i could add 4 cm so i can at leaste be 1.70 without LL that woud make me a lot more happy.

It must be heavy living in the tallest country in the world at that height...

I say consider vacations in Portugal (northern and south), or maybe moving there after you're finished with school. A degree from the Netherlands will be very appreciated there. And you don't know need to sacrifice your legs and years of your life to almost become average. It's also an EU country with high standards of living.

[Microbe]

One thing I've realised is that even after successful LL and attaining your target LL, people will go back to their usual ways and worry start worrying about old and new things. It's human nature after all to be preoccupied and entertained with their past and future, leading to depression and anxiety. We have been programmed this way by society to crave and consume things, an endless cycle, otherwise you'll be considered a failure. Relationships, status, fame, wealth, possessions, looks, trying to impress others etc....You will never be content with superficial materialistic desires, chasing materialistic dreams seems to be an illusion, only to end up with temporary satisfaction and then going back to old ways of worrying about something else to seek perfection. Life's basically a game that we can never win. Something I'm sure most people in their deathbeds realise, along with the futility of longing and suffering for such desires.
Anyway take it easy, don't take life seriously, try and live in the current moment, forget the concept of wasted life and start new by setting realistic goals you'll be content without being overly consumed and detrimental to your wellbeing. F*** judgemental superficial people, you cannot impress everyone. Try being happy with less, something I'm striving for and realised after my LL.

[AlphaX]

In a sense you are absolutely right. We are caught in a vicious circle of our society.

However, I do not agree with you when you summarize this routine with single note case (that of the Man).
All species on this planet have a routine, an already programmed system that they must follow. We are one of the few to have free will, a possible choice.

Yes, society imposes a lifestyle on us. But we make the choice to follow him, not because it is in our instinct but because we are too weak to oppose it or not rich enough to live there.
There are many who live outside this crazy world of consumption by choice or because they can not afford it.

If I always wanted to have an LL for my part it's because I always had a well-defined image of who I wanted to be. I have never had a problem with what others think of me. My only fear is to wake up old knowing I have not done what I had to do and not look like the one I would like to be.

You can try to follow this society or you can try to rise above it and for it you must be at peace with yourself and be the one you want to be. From there, nothing will be able to reach you, not even money or this system of consumption.

[Microbe]

Yes we all do have choice, however unfortunately majority of us won't realise this due to being totally hardwired, dictated and distracted by the system imposed by the society.   

[myloginacct]

Given the psychological (i.e. mental) origin of height dysphoria (is anyone going to argue with me HN/HD is thyroidal in origin?), yes, there's probably a tendency in most to focus on another neurosis or craving after LL, if the LL is enough to make it go away.

Obviously, our discontent with our height stems from how either others treat us, how see ourselves, or both. However, there was never any higher power forcing us to care this much about it, or feel about it the way we do when it's brought up to us.

[extremis]

Given the psychological (i.e. mental) origin of height dysphoria (is anyone going to argue with me HN/HD is thyroidal in origin?),

If by "thyroidal" you meant "originating from the thyroid", then I'm guessing you could find a whole host of people willing to argue with you, yes

yes, there's probably a tendency in most to focus on another neurosis or craving after LL, if the LL is enough to make it go away.

Obviously, our discontent with our height stems from how either others treat us, how see ourselves, or both. However, there was never any higher power forcing us to care this much about it, or feel about it the way we do when it's brought up to us.

I don't think this follows. If the source of a "neurosis" is external to the individual (i.e. based on others' treatment of the individual), there's no reason to think it's likely for an individual who was able to beat a neurosis by addressing its cause (short stature) would develop another unless they have some other physical feature that elicits similar treatment by that person's peers as their short stature did - for example, androgenic alopecia, having a small penis, having a particularly unattractive face, being a member of an ethnic group considered conventionally unattractive (in males, asians/brown-skinned groups such as indians come to mind)

The majority of individuals can live perfectly fine with one or more aesthetic flaws so long as their quality of life does not suffer considerably as a result of those flaws (as is the case with short statured/balding/small penis/facially unattractive men), hence it is much more reasonable to conclude that in order for an imperfection to be a source of a neurosis, that imperfection must be pronounced enough to elicit severe discrimination/mistreatment from a person's peers.

[myloginacct]

If by "thyroidal" you meant "originating from the thyroid", then I'm guessing you could find a whole host of people willing to argue with you, yes

I don't think this follows. If the source of a "neurosis" is external to the individual (i.e. based on others' treatment of the individual), there's no reason to think it's likely for an individual who was able to beat a neurosis by addressing its cause (short stature) would develop another unless they have some other physical feature that elicits similar treatment by that person's peers as their short stature did - for example, androgenic alopecia, having a small penis, having a particularly unattractive face, being a member of an ethnic group considered conventionally unattractive (in males, asians/brown-skinned groups such as indians come to mind)

The majority of individuals can live perfectly fine with one or more aesthetic flaws so long as their quality of life does not suffer considerably as a result of those flaws (as is the case with short statured/balding/small penis/facially unattractive men), hence it is much more reasonable to conclude that in order for an imperfection to be a source of a neurosis, that imperfection must be pronounced enough to elicit severe discrimination/mistreatment from a person's peers.

Thinking more about this issue, I mostly agree with you.

I disagree with a notion that all height neurosis cases are purely due to external reasons, however. It's mostly in these exceptions that I'd expect a tendency to move onto something else - so not "most", as I've previously stated.

[Marazs]

I understand how you feel completely, at just under168 before LL myself, I would always compare my height with others, it's is something you constantly think about, but thinking that life is wasted is too much.  It sounds like you don't have a very positive mentality in general, and you really need to change that period. You are young.

You might not have any immediate control over the situation right at the moment, so your energy should concentrate on what you can do now. Finish school, work hard, save, save, save, and put yourself in a situation where you can do LL with a competent Doctor and in a safe environment.

I am 45 years old, and just went through LL myself.  I didn't see myself as being too old. I am now more mature, and financially stable.  Yes,  I would have loved to get LL earlier in life, but I couldn't do it for many reasons. I will enjoy the next 15 years of being the height I always wanted, and will make the most of it.

Be positive first, and sacrifice a little under your current circumstances.  Focus on your future after LL.

Wish you all the best!

Thanks for your comment. I try to think possitif in different ways but every conclusion i finally come feels like that, i can't really describe it different. Something is wasted. I would like to be mentally strong but i cant force my brain to be possitif.

It must be heavy living in the tallest country in the world at that height...

I say consider vacations in Portugal (northern and south), or maybe moving there after you're finished with school. A degree from the Netherlands will be very appreciated there. And you don't know need to sacrifice your legs and years of your life to almost become average. It's also an EU country with high standards of living.

Thanks for your advice, but average or not if you could live your live in the same circumstances like them and been too short wouldnt make you mantally broken, then you can be satisfied of your live. It is al least in your hands to be. Not that I could ever do LL but i would encourage those who do that and be happy for them.

And isnt it verry embarrassing enough to have to leave your homeland to get happiness??