I hated CS in college for a little while even though I was near the top of my class in it. I did an arts double major to have some fun in college too. Ultimately it was worth getting the CS degree since I backed into an extremely high paying job at age 21 and was able to afford CLL before my mid 20s.
CS degree is dazzling but I've been skeptical about if I can struggle for it and my college can't offer other interesting second majors such as Maths,Physics and Astronomy cuz my college is civilian-run,lacking of government supports.
I'm also kinda despising my collegemates cuz I think I've just fallen into a hole riddled with worms and rats.I'm not tarnishing them just regretting why I couldn't have graduated to more outstanding universities.
Acutally I'm so distressed out of my failure in Gaokao of 2019.
My English score was only 86,whose maximum is 150 and I got a failure in my best subject and that was torturing me in my mind and dreams.
What's worse,my other subjects' scores are also not very excellent and my parents were maintaining wordless cuz they didn't even wanna trigger my negative emotions during that time.
Srsly I'm feeling like a loser not only due to height also academic performances.I'm recently taking depressants to resolve my depressions and light anxiety disorder.